The Invasion of the Fluffy Pink Nightmare
by ChickInStarkTower
Summary: Mark has a new girlfriend, and when she moves in, Roger begins to notice that between she and Mimi, the loft is becoming a lot more feminine.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own RENT, but Alexia Hemmingway is a new character of my own invention.

Authoress note: This is my first fan fic, wish me luck!

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The Attack of the Fluffy Pink Nightmare

Prologue

The Escada lotion that suddenly appeared in the bathroom tipped him off first.

The light blue, flip-flop slippers.

The Pink bathrobe.

Then, _it _appeared.

Until _it_ came into the bathroom, Roger had been more or less ignoring the certain feminine touch that had recently made it's self known in the loft. He had just chalked it up, along with the late night giggling, to two women's cohabitation with he and Mark.

Mark.

It was all Mark's fault.

Mark had a girlfriend now.

And she'd just moved in.

Her name was Alexia Hemmingway. Brunette, beautiful, with brown eyes behind her thin, very stylish glasses that some people didn't even really notice, she was a little on the short side, only about 5'4". Intelligent, she was an actress/authoress by choice. Her dad was a senator, and her mom was some high powered, big wig Realtor.

Roger had like Alexia when they were introduced. Not liked in _that_ way, but she was cool. Much cooler than Maureen when she and Mark had first started dating. Alexia's family was well to do, it was obvious, (as he later found out from Joanne, well to do to the tune of twenty or more million, and a few European vacation homes), but Alexia was embarrassed by it. She was a true Bohemian.

Alexia understood music, and Roger was fairly certain why he thought so highly of her. A couple of weeks ago, they were all in the loft, Mimi was still asleep, Alexia was in the makeshift kitchen making tea and he and Mark were sitting on the plaid duct taped couch. Mark was fiddling with his camera (which Alexia also understood. Roger often wondered how she did it), and he was, as usual, strumming his guitar, trying to tune it.

As soon as it was tuned, Roger began to pluck out Musetta's waltz. To Roger's surprise (not so much Mark's. She was his girlfriend after all), Alexia began singing Musetta's aria, _Quando me'n vo_, from La Boheme. She sang quietly at first, but as Roger adjusted to her key and tempo, she gradually crescendoed until Mimi emerged from her room, listening intently.

Mark then began filming as Roger noticed how clear her voice was.

"My girlfriend, the opera star." Mark narrated.

Alexia stopped for a moment, but Roger kept playing softly. "I wish." she said to the camera.

"Keep singing chica!" Mimi called. "Brava!"

Alexia obeyed, and sauntered over to the couch carrying the mugs of hot tea. She slopped a little on the floor. "Oops," she giggled and retreated back to the kitchen to get a towel to clean up the tea before someone, most probably Mark fell in it. _Smart girl_, Roger thought, _she's realized how klutzy Mark is_.

He laughed at sat his guitar down, turning to the blonde filmmaker. "She should move in. She'd fit right in." He said semi-sarcastically, "Maybe she'd even be a different ear for Meems to talk off." Roger was almost serious, but not quite. He wasn't ready for another female in the loft. One pair of X chromosomes was enough. Mimi was enough.

Mark, however, had been watching Alexia, and heard what he had said, but not the sarcasm. "Good idea." he said to Roger, and then stood up, talking to Alexia as Mimi sat down next to Roger.

"Hey, Alexia, sweetie," Mark began with rising confidence, "why don't you move in?"

Alexia paused, Roger and Mimi's jaws dropped simultaneously. Alexia then smiled broadly, squealed, and ran to throw her arms around Mark, kissing him. "Yes! Yes! Yes!" she shrieked, "That'd be great!"

Mimi sighed wistfully, and Roger knew she was remembering when he had asked her the same question. "Aren't they adorable?" she asked.

Roger just looked at Mark and Alexia kissing and a strange feeling came over him. A feeling like he knew he may learn to spell trouble A-L-E-X-I-A.

But, standing in the bathroom a few weeks later, he never expected this.

The little blue box.

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Reply please!


	2. Chapter One: The blue box and Benny

Disclaimer: I still don't own RENT. Alexia, however, is my character. Tell me what you think of her.

Also, the lyrics used as a thought in this chapter, aren't mine either.

Authoress Note: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, I love reading them!

Chapter One:

Roger stuck his head in Mimi's bedroom door.

"Meems."

No answer.

"Meems."

"MIMI."

"What?" Mimi answered groggily, rubbing at her eyes and turning on the little lamp on her bedside table. "Oh, Roger," she turned her covers down, "I was wondering if you were coming in."

Roger sighed, annoyed. "Not now." he paused, trying to find the right words to say exactly what he wanted to say. "I, uh, need you to tell me what something is."

She just stared at him blankly. Then, after a few moments "What?" Mimi was tired, and she didn't want to think. "What time is it?" she looked at her clock "Rog, it's only six o'clock. I'm going back to sleep. Come back around noon." She laid back down.

Roger thought of going in and waking up Mark, but, he wouldn't be much of help either. Mimi was his only choice.

"Mimi, get up!" He whispered vehemently.

"Fine, fine!" she said, hoping out of bed with a dull thud. She tossed her alarm clock in Roger's general direction, it hit the painted floor upside down and began beeping very loudly. Roger picked it up to try to shut it off, and just began pressing random buttons.

It responded by beeping even louder. _Great_, he thought, _let's wake up the whole building_.

Finally, Mimi ripped it out of his hands, mumbling a few obscenities under her breath, and turned it off. There were a few moments of silence, and then:

"What the hell?"

Roger panicked. The alarm had woken Mark up. Mark would wake up Alexia, she'd wonder why he was so concerned about the little blue box, and she may just beat him over the head with his own guitar for asking.

_Women._ He thought. _What is it about them?_ _Can't live with them_, but, then he saw Mimi in all her just crawled out of bed glory, and thought about how much Mark loved Alexia, and how she loved him back, _or without them_.

"Roger?" Mark called from across the loft.

Roger didn't know what to do. It was too early to be thinking on his feet. He'd just gotten up to use the restroom, and then this!

Mimi began tapping her foot impatiently, and a light bulb came on in Roger's brain, somewhere in between dead end lyrics and guitar chords. He cleared his throat and Mimi raised an eyebrow.

"It's uh, just me Marky," he said in a high pitched falsetto imitation of a female voice, more importantly an imitation of Alexia's voice. Mimi put her hand over her mouth to muffle her laughter.

"Just me, Alexia."

There was silence for a minute, and Roger let out a sigh of relief. Mark had fallen for it. He thought it was his girlfriend getting up early to go gallivanting around the apartment, leaving her blue box in the bathroom.

But, little did the musician know, Mark was sitting straight up in bed, wondering how Alexia could be lying next to him, still asleep, _and_ shouting to him from across the apartment. Then, he shook he sleep from his brain and began thinking clearly. Alexia wasn't across the loft. But someone was.

Mark's first thought was that it was either Benny or an intruder. Maybe some jerk had followed Mimi home from the Catscratch. Either way, they weren't welcome in the loft. He grabbed one of Alexia's character shoes that had a pretty good heel on it as a weapon and, went to deal with the intruder.

God, he hoped it was Benny.

Meanwhile, Roger was pulling Mimi by the wrist into the bathroom.

"Ooh, the bathroom." Mimi said sarcastically, " Are you going to show me the toilet? Did you finally learn to put the seat down?"

But, Mark didn't hear any of this. All he saw in the just rising sunlight was some guy bigger than he was dragging Mimi toward the bathroom. He crept up behind them and raised the character shoe to attack.

Collins flung open the door to the loft and flicked on the light. "Good Morn-" the sentence stopped as it was being spoken. He blinked a few times to assure himself that he was really seeing was he thought he saw. Roger had Mimi by the wrist, dragging her toward the bathroom, and Mark was stopped mid-swing, raising a high heeled shoe above his roommate's head, ready to attack him with it. Collins blinked again and then laughed. "Morning everyone. Mark losing his temper again?"

Mark could feel himself blush bright crimson. Once Collins shone a little light on the apartment, he realized that the guy dragging Mimi toward the bathroom was Roger.

And, he realized how stupid he must look ready to attack him with a shoe.

"What is going on out here?" Alexia asked, appearing in Mark's bedroom doorway. She paused, taking it all in. Roger let go of Mimi, and Mark tried to hid the shoe behind his back. Alexia saw it anyway. "Mark, honey what are you doing with one of my shoes?"

He just smiled sheepishly. Alexia shook her head. "I'm not sure I even want to know."

Collins began laughing uncontrollably. He looked at Mark "You thought that-" then, he looked at Roger and Mimi, " And they were-" Finally, he looked at Alexia, "And she saw it all!". He had to sit down on the couch he was laughing so hard.

Everyone just stared at him, throughly confused.

Alexia looked at the clock on the wall in the kitchen which she had learned recently was three hours slow. It read 3:30 A.M.

A heavy rap on the door made Collins stop laughing and Roger finally pulled Mimi into the bathroom. Mark went for the door, but Roger grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him into the bathroom too, pulling him so hard that the filmmaker lost his balance and landed on his rear. As he got up, he asked "What was that all about?"

Mimi cocked her head to one side as if to say _Yeah, what he said_.

Roger just pointed at the box.

Mark just laughed. "Oh yeah, that's-"

"AND STAY OUT! WHEN YOU FIX THE FREAKING HEAT IN THIS BUILDING, I'LL WRITE YOU A CHECK! **NOT UNTIL THEN**!" Alexia screamed. Mark stuck his head out the door quickly, Mimi and Roger following suit. They saw Alexia taking Benny by the shoulders (he was almost a foot taller than she, she had to reach up to do it), spin him around a full half-turn, and give him a swift kick in the seat of the pants, sending him spiraling, almost down the stairs. She watched him run out of the building, slammed the door, and turned to face the beaming Mark with a sassy smile on her face.

Roger's first impression was right. He _did_ like Alexia.

There was a second of silence, and then thunderous applause and cheers erupted. Alexia just smiled more broadly. Mark went over an kissed her until they had to come up for air. She giggled. "What was that so long for?"

"For doing what we've all always wanted to do."

"Yeah," Alexia said triumphantly, "he said he was coming by for the rent, and if no one came to the door, he was just going to post an eviction notice."

"And you kicked him out!" Mark kissed her again.

Roger and Collins cracked up. "She didn't just kick him out, she kicked his asno de extremo!" Mimi shouted. Then, as things calmed down a bit, she turned to Roger. "So, Rog, what did you drag me out of bed for? What's in the bathroom?"

All eyes were on the musician. He could feel the three pairs of brown, and one pair of shocking blue boring into him.

Alexia raised the pointer finger of her left hand in a _wait a second, I think I've forgotten to tell you all something important _gesture. "Oh, yeah, did I warn you all, Maureen left some toilet paper here?"

Now all eyes were on her. Roger was glad the pressure Mimi had put on him was off.

Collins spoke up, "She left some at my place too, the stuff in the blue box?"

Roger's eyes grew wide. **THE **blue box?

"Yup." Alexia answered, "She told me this whole involved story last week while she was helping me unpack. What a mistake that was, asking her for help. First she detailed her relationship with Mark. I mean she told me _everything_,"

Mark blushed, and then said shakily with a nervous laugh "Everything, honey?"

Alexia continued "Everything. Anyway, then she told me about how her butt had like become extra sensitive since she got this new tattoo, which she explained in painstaking detail, too, something to do with the ink, and now she can only use this special unbleached toilet paper that's made somewhere zany like Sri Lanka. She has to by it a that all organic market on 5th. She left some here in case she has to do her business while she's here."

Roger breathed a sigh of relief. He really didn't want to get the Kotex talk from Mark's girlfriend, no matter how cool she was. That would be really awkward.

But, it was even more awkward knowing about Maureen's toilet paper- allergy problems. Not that he wouldn't like to see her new tattoo, but, he didn't need to hear the side effects.

"And, she said if anyone touched it, she'd kill 'em. Knowing Maureen, she might actually try." Alexia laughed at her own joke, and Mark smirked as well.

"Hey up there!" A voice shouted from below the window so loud that it could be heard in the loft. The ping of a pebble hitting the glass followed. Alexia sighed like and angry bull, took the shoe from Mark's hand, and opened the window.

"I'm coming back soon!" Benny shouted "You haven't won! This is my building!"

"Not for long!" she shouted and tossed the shoe in Benny's direction "I just might buy it!"

The screech of a cat below warned the others for future reference that Alexia did not have good aim. She flinched "Sorry kitty!" she called.

Alexia turned around to more applause, then crossed to the chair where she had hung her coat, and proceeded to put it on.

"Are you going to see if the cat's okay?" Mark asked, donning his own jacket and following her to the door.

"Yeah," Alexia answered, "And to see if _my shoe's_ alright."

Alexia kicking Benny out? A passionate kiss between Mark and Alexia (okay, not really a shock or surprise, but, still...)? Maureen using special toilet paper? Roger wanting to see her new tattoo? Alexia buying the building? Find out what happens...

As soon as I update.

Which I'll do soon.

Thanks again for the great reviews. It'd be awesome if you guys kept 'em coming!

Sorry it was so long.

TTYL

P.C. (Post-Chapter): How many of you found the lyrics from 'Take Me or Leave Me' (which are not mine. They belong to Jonathan Larson)?


	3. Chapter Two: Girls will be Girls

Disclaimer: Yup. I still don't own it. Or tick,tick...BOOM! Either (that'll make a lot more sense at the end of the chapter.

Authoress note: Thanks again for the reviews. I'm glad you guys like Alexia! She is most defiantly not a Mary Sue. Thanks to SparklyDragnStrikers for suggesting that I show that. This chapter's not going to be as slapstick-y funny.

I'll update soon.

Sorry it's so long.

TTYL

Chapter Two:

Mark wasn't up yet, and Alexia sat on the couch, already showered and dressed in her little pink collared shirt and olive green shorts, flipping through Vogue, a cup of rapidly cooling tea in her hands. Maureen flung the door open, and Alexia shushed her, pointing to the closed bedroom door. Maureen just sighed, clearly pissed.

"Joanne used some of my paper last night."

Alexia retorted "I bought the building last night."

"That's cool", a short pause, "WHAT!"

Alexia shushed her again. "I'm waiting until they get up to tell them."

Maureen practically fell over what Roger and Mark called the coffee table that Alexia completely intended to replace soon, trying to sit next to Alexia on the couch. " You bought the building! How?"

"Threatened Benny." Alexia laughed, "But no one else needs to know that."

"Threatened him, How?"

"I told him I'd have someone at my father's office check into his back tax records." Alexia pulled a piece of paper out of her magazine. "Here, read this, is it obvious enough?" She handed the paper to Maureen. In Alexia's handwriting, it read:

_Marky, _

_I, Alexia Hemmingway, forever forgo any collection of rent to be paid by the tenants of this apartment. A copy of this document is on file at Senator Alex Hemmingway's office, and at the realty office of Hemmingway, Hemmingway and Cavanaugh. _

_I Love You Pookie,_

_Alexia Hemmingway_

Maureen blinked a few times.

Pookie? That's what she used to call Mark. But, then she shook her head. "No, there's something missing."

Alexia looked confused. "Somethings Missing?"

"Yeah," Maureen was now digging in her purse, and taking things out that weren't what she was looking for, setting them on the couch between she and Alexia. First, a roll of toilet paper. _Dear God_, Alexia thought, _She's even carrying it around_. Then, her keys, then an apple. Alexia looked at her strangely. "Lunch." Maureen explained.

Alexia just nodded.

Maureen pulled her cosmetics case out of her bag and thrust it at Alexia, who replied "What am I supposed to do with this?"

"There's some lipstick in a shiny green case and a mirror in there. Put some of the lipstick on." Maureen paused, Alexia didn't do anything. "Well, hurry before Mark wakes up."

Alexia obeyed, but, as she was gliding the red over her lips, she looked over the top of the mirror and saw Maureen folding the paper right beneath her signature. "What are you doing?" she demanded.

Maureen just shoved the paper at her. "Blot." she said, and unfolded the paper, gingerly smoothing it out so that it appeared to never have been folded. She looked at it proudly, and passed it to Alexia. "There. You signed it with a kiss." She got up to place it on the table, where Mark would see it.

Mimi came out of the bathroom, and tip-toed over to Alexia "We've gotta go." she said

"I wanted to wait until Mark got up and saw the note."

"No time, we'll be late and they'll think it was my fault."

Alexia looked toward Mark's door, as if she expected it to open, "Fine" she grabbed her jacket and handbag and started to leave with a simple "Bye Maureen."

"Wait, wait, wait, where are you going?"

"The theater." Alexia answered, "Mimi wanted to see how being an actress worked."

"Why didn't you invite me?" Maureen whined. She really was trying to make friends with Alexia, for Mark's sake if nothing else. They were pretty serious, who knows, she might be around for a while. God, they way Mark talked about her, she may be around for ever, but Alexia was making it kind of hard.

"Well," Alexia answered earnestly, "I thought you wouldn't want to come, because you're so popular for your pieces around her and I thought coming to a rehearsal for a three person musical might bore you."

Maureen grabbed her coat. "Are you kidding me?"

And with that, they left, leaving Mark and Roger to see the note informing them of their new landlord, er, landlady.

Walking down the busy New York Street, busy with people rushing in and out of building, talking on cell phones, and answering beeping pagers, Mimi suddenly turned to Alexia.

"Have you ever thought what it would be like to, you know, settle down."

Both Alexia and Maureen stopped dead in their tracks.

"What?" Alexia asked, confused. "Settle down?"

Mimi just kind of smiled. "Yeah, you know, get married, buy a dog-"

"Adopt a dog." Alexia interrupted. Maureen glared at her as if the words have just been stolen out of her mouth.

"Fine, fine **adopt** a dog, have kids-"

"No way."

"Oh, why not Alexia?"

"I don't like kids. They're all like Mark's little nieces and nephews. Snot nosed little germ balls that are dumped on you at the most inopportune moments."

Maureen had to think a minute. Then, she shook the thought from her mind. "Good." she said. "Honeybear and I can just drop ours off with Auntie Alexia and Uncle Marky, and then we can have a night out on the town!"

Alexia and Mimi couldn't help thinking the same thing. God help the kids Maureen is a parent to. Luckily, she, in her current relationship anyway, ever have kids. Alexia told her so. "Maureen, you and Joanne can't have kids."

Maureen tisked "If you can adopt a dog, than Joanne and I can _certainly_ adopt a kid."

Alexia just nodded with a simple "Whatever you say Maureen.".

It grew quiet between the three of them for a while, and then Maureen asked abruptly "Alexia, are you and Mark serious? Like, really serious?"

Alexia looked at her oddly. "I certainly hope so."

"Do you love each other?"

Alexia just started rambling, she didn't even think about it. "I've never been in love before, Mo, I don't have a very big frame of reference. Hell, I don't have a frame of reference, all I have is the matted print. I feel giddy, like I'm being tickled when I come home from the theater at night, and he's there, asleep on the couch, trying to wait up for me. I feel safe, safer than I've ever felt when I'm with him. And, when it's really cold, and Mark's sitting there on the window seat, watching the snow falling, I'll go over and cuddle with him. And even though it's cold and I know that, I feel warm, and I know he feels the same way, too. And when I'm away from him at a really long rehearsal, my heart hurts Mo. You'll probably think I'm insane, but, I'll call him just to hear his voice. Just to hear him say I love you." She took a deep breath and looked Maureen right in the eyes. "Yes Maureen. I'm in love."

Maureen smiled. Alexia _did_ love Mark more than she ever did. "Yes, you are in love."

Mimi ran a few steps ahead of Alexia. "Mrs. Alexia Cohen." she looked at Maureen. "It does sound good, doesn't it?"

"So does Mrs. Mimi Davis!" Alexia retorted playfully, sticking her tongue out. They laughed.

They both turned on Maureen. They didn't even have to say it. She did for them, "Or Mrs. Maureen Jefferson."

Alexia stopped laughing for a second, and then, chuckled, to hide the fact that she didn't think that name sounded right. But, then she smiled warmly for real. She and Maureen and Mimi were acting like they were sixteen again, giggling like school girls with crushes. Only, their crushes were the real thing this time.

She didn't need the real sisters she had longed for so much in her childhood. She had a perfect pair right in front of her.

Maureen opened the door to the theater for Alexia. "Right this way, Mrs. Alexia Cohen."

Alexia smiled. It **_did_** sound good.

Maureen had been wrong back in the loft. Very wrong. She was bored, and dozing off in the tiny Workshop space.

Then, there was screaming and jumping up and down, and Maureen was suddenly awake. "Lincoln Center! LINCOLN CENTER!" she heard Mimi and Alexia scream. The director, a red head who Maureen had noticed earlier and resolved to get her phone number in case things with Joanne went sour (they had been bickering more than usual lately), tapped Alexia on the shoulder.

"Okay, calm down." then she spoke to everyone, all three cast members and six crew with Mimi and Maureen sitting in, "This is the big time. Not usually does a three person show get to Lincoln Center."

Alexia crept back into the apartment around two-thirty in the morning, having sent Mimi home at ten, and Maureen at eleven. Rehearsal had run late, really late. She was supposed to be out of there by six, but with everything that happened.

It was hard to believe that Lincoln Center wanted **them**. Her and the two other actors. And in six days. Crazy.

She turned on a nearby lamp, and saw Mark on the couch, waiting for her. She got that tickled feeling. He was waiting up for her. On closer examination, she realized that he had fallen asleep. She wondered if it sucked having an actress for a girlfriend, having to wait for her when rehearsal ran late, possibly having to watch her kiss other men for the sake of art, not being able to film her rehearsals for copyright reasons.

But, if Mark cared, he never said anything. She did love him, and he loved her.

Alexia sat her bag and libretto down, then went over and sat down next to Mark. He woke up immediately, and sat up, straightening his glasses. When he saw who it was sitting next to him, he said "I got the note. You actually bought the building."

"Yeah."

"You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to."

"You don't have to forgo the rent, either. Rog and I'll come up with it somehow."

"You are not paying rent to your girlfriend." she paused, then took his hand, noticing that it was colder than hers, and she always had cold hands anyway. "We made Lincoln Center."

"What?" Mark asked, not sure he had heard what she had said correctly.

"Lincoln Center wants us, the play, I mean. Didn't Mimi tell you?" she asked, shocked that Mimi could keep _anything_ to herself.

"Damn, I must have fallen asleep before she came in." Mark yawned.

"Then go back to sleep."

"What about you?" he asked.

"I'll be right back." Alexia answered, and then went off to take a shower, noticing that Mimi wasn't in her room, or Roger's, who was up and playing his guitar. He motioned Alexia into his room. She hesitated for a moment, and then entered.

"Is Mimi with you?" he asked.

"No," Alexia retorted, "I sent her home at ten. She was starting to fall asleep. She's not here?"

"No." Roger grabbed a sweatshirt, threw it on, and before she knew it, was brushing past Alexia.

"Do you want me to go with you?" she asked, worried where Roger may be heading.

"No. Mark's been waiting all night for you to get home. Stay with him." And with that, Roger was out of the loft.

So, Alexia went into the bathroom, undressed and stepped into the shower. The hot water felt good. She was sore from running the second number so many times. And now, she was worried about Mimi.

As she stepped out of the bathroom, she heard the door open, and Roger and Mimi entered, kissing, and kept kissing until they were right past her and into Roger's room, without even noticing her.

Alexia didn't even want to know.

She turned of the lamp, and head Roger's door slam shut. In the darkness, she walked over to the couch and laid down next to Mark. Why she hadn't told him to go to bed, she didn't know, and laying at the odd angle she was, trying not to slip of the edge, wished she had. But, then, still asleep, Mark put his arm around her, holding on to her, and she knew she couldn't fall of the couch if she wanted to.

A strange thought floated into Alexia's head:

Mrs. Alexia Cohen.

Mimi and Maureen were right. She did want to settle down eventually. She wanted to settle down with Mark, and do the whole thing. Marriage, dog – well, okay, not the kids part. She still wasn't crazy about little kids, and she and Mark would be stuck babysitting Maureen's all the time anyway- and it would be perfect

It was a wonderful thought.

And she was asleep before something else could push it out of her mind.

Love? Alexia, Maureen and Mimi talking about marriage? Alexia's show making an appearance at Lincoln Center? Alexia deciding she did eventually want to settle down with Mark? What will Mark think about that?

I'll update soon, I promise.

TTYL


	4. Chapter Three: You Can Dress 'Em Up

Disclaimer: I still don't own it. RENT, or tick,tick...BOOM! Jonathan Larson does.

Authoress Note: I guess every girl does have a Godmother. Thanks for the great review! This chapter's going to be on the slapstick-y side. And Sparrow's Someone, your wish is granted.

It's long again.

A Season of Love,

VivaLaVieBohemeA

TTYL

Chapter Three: You Can Dress 'Em up, But You Can't Take 'Em Out

Mark was editing in his bedroom, and Roger was doing...

Well, nothing. La Boheme was blaring from Mark's room. _Ah,_ Roger thought,_ Alexia must be in there with him. Helping him edit._ And Roger really meant it. Alexia was the only person that Mark had ever let help him cut a film together.

The shower was running, and the only other person left in the loft was Mimi. And Roger was Roger, so he decided to sneak in on her. There was nothing else to do anyway.

The female figure behind the newly pale pink (thanks to Alexia) shower curtain lured Roger in. He crept across the re-tiled (also, thanks to Alexia, but at least this one was an agreeable shade of, _What did Alexia call it?_ _Taupe?_) floor and on to the plush pink (_It's taking over_) bathmat. Mimi still didn't know he was there. He crept up closer and flung back the curtain.

_Oh, not Mimi._

Alexia screamed and grabbed for the towel hanging on the towel rack with the little ducky end pieces that was within reach. She kept screaming, and he screamed too, running out of the bathroom into the living room where the real Mimi no sat. She jumped up from the couch "What's going on? Roger!"

Alexia, now wearing a towel rushing across the loft towards Mark's closed bedroom door. "Mark! Mark! Mark! MARK!" she was screaming as she burst in. "MARK!"

He turned from what he was working on, his electric blue eyes wide at her attire. He was speechless.

Roger followed her in, trying to fix the situation. It didn't help. Alexia pointed at him. "Mark! He just walked in on me!"

"Huh?" Mark was throughly confused.

"I was in the shower," she explained "And your roommate rushes in, and throws the curtain back! I was in the shower Mark! You don't exactly wear clothes in the shower!"

"It was an accident! I thought you were Mimi!"

"Mimi wasn't home!"

Upon hearing her name, Mimi rushed in as well. "You saw her in the shower?" she hissed at Roger, pointing at Alexia who was dripping wet, her hair leaving a puddle on Mark's bedroom floor. Sh hadn't exactly had time time to dry it.

"Ooh, who was in the shower?" asked Maureen as she and Joanne entered the loft with Collins following behind them like a little, philosophical puppy. They made their way to all the commotion, and upon seeing Alexia in her blue hibiscus print towel, she added "Alexia, hi, hey have you ever thought about becoming a-"

"MAUREEN!" Mark shouted, finally understanding the whole scene, and what had happened. Mark was a very intelligent person, a genius, even, but this had caught him off guard. Now he understood. "Alexia is **not** a -"

"-model?" Maureen finished like she hadn't heard Mark. "You have the figure for it."

Alexia looked flattered, and things seemed to calm down a bit until Roger added, "That's for sure."

Alexia sighed angrily. "I didn't intend on _you_ knowing that."

Mark attempted to stop the bickering between, well, just about everyone, save for Joanne and Collins. "Alright, Roger, learn to knock. Mimi, tell Roger when you going out. Maureen, Alexia isn't of your persuasion. Alexia, go get dressed. We have reservations. I thought just you and I would go, but, we're all here so, everyone, let's go."

Everyone just looked at him. He smiled at Alexia, that cute _I Love You_ grin. She returned it. Joanne saw it and felt a twinge of nausea. Alexia felt that tickle-y feeling. "Where?" she asked?

Mark thought he saw Alexia start to lose her towel. He nodded his head slightly toward it, and Alexia adjusted it. Roger looked away. "That is for me to know and you to find out. No go, so I can tell everyone else."

She pouted, and spun out of the room.

"Mark, **where** are we _going_?" Alexia asked as they hit a bump in the road in her little blue Mercedes.

"Crazy!" Roger answered from the back seat mockingly, yet enthusiastically. And, for Roger, doing anything enthusiastically was quite an achievement.

"You're lucky I'm driving and can't take my hands off the wheel," Mark began, never taking his eyes off the road, because if you did that in New York, you may as well drive straight to the insurance claims office. "Or I'd be punching you in the arm you right now."

"You hit like a girl Mark," Roger said. Alexia turned around in her seat as far as her seatbelt would allow, and gave him a look that, if looks could kill, Alexia would be arrested for murder. "And not Alexia either," Roger quickly covered. "She could kick my a-"

Mimi elbowed him in the ribs. "Don't cuss."

"Butt! I was going to say butt!"

"Uh-huh. And I'm Miss America." Mimi answered sarcastically.

_God,_ Alexia thought, _acting like a teenager twice in two days. That's a new record even for me._

They were like a car full of teenagers. All paired off and bickering.

At the next light they stopped at, a black Chrysler pulled up next to them and lightly beeped it's horn. Alexia and Mark looked over to see Maureen waving hysterically, and Joanne intently watching the light. Collins sat calmly in the back, and Alexia wondered what he had smoked before he left his apartment. Collins was infamous for that.

Roger noticed the car. "Hey, look, speaking of butts, there's Maureen!" Mimi waved, and Joanne pulled over in behind Mark as the light turned green.

"Mark, I'm starting to think you're kidnapping me. Where are we going?" Alexia asked a few minutes later as they turned onto 5th Avenue, heading toward Central Park. "Are we going to a picnic, because I really didn't dress for a-" Mark pulled up to the valet by the sign that read, in big, maroon letters: **_TAVERN ON THE GREEN_**.

Alexia gasped. "Mark! I love this place!" she leaned over and kissed him. "Angel introduced us here, remember?"

"Marky and Alexia, sitting in the car-" Mimi sang.

"Shut it Mimi. I'm having a moment here." Alexia spouted playfully. They kissed again, and Roger made a silent gagging motion so that only Mimi could see. She giggled, and Mark and Alexia didn't even notice.

They hopped out of the car, and Mark handed the valet the keys to the Mercedes. When Mark wasn't paying attention, Alexia slipped the teenager a tip. The valet nodded a silent thank-you and went off to park the car so his co-worker could park Joanne's Chrysler that was rapidly approaching.

"What do you think about this, Honeybear?"

"Maureen, don't order that. It'll make you sick."

"No it won't. Vichyssoise never make me sick." Maureen answered.

"Do you even know what Vichyssoise is Maureen?" Joanne turned to her girlfriend.

"That French, potato soupy stuff."

Joanne just sighed. There was no arguing with Maureen.

"What are you going to have?" Mimi nudged Roger.

"I don't know." he answered dryly. "I can hardly read some off this stuff. And, If I can't read it, I won't eat it."

Mimi just rolled her eyes. "Oh for God's sake, would it kill you to have some culture."

Alexia sipped her Shirley Temple, and speared the cherry in the bottom with her straw, slopping little pink dots of grenadine in the process. They fell to the hunter green napkin gracefully folded in a triangle on her lap. "What are you having?" she asked Mark.

"I have no idea." He answered.

Alexia looked over at his open menu. "I'm having the linguine Alfredo. It's really good here." Mark didn't look overly enthusiastic, so she tried again. "They have other stuff here, too."

Collins wasn't talking to anyone, and he liked it that way. This way, he could just observe, picking up random little facts about the happy couples. Maureen was ordering a French soup that would make her sick, and Joanne was trying to tell her so. As usual, Maureen wasn't listening. Roger was having trouble pronouncing some of the more foreign names on the menu, and Mimi was calling him uncultured. Collins chuckled, guessing that Roger would probably just end up with a cheeseburger.

Mark didn't seem to like the idea of pasta. Mark had never liked the idea of pasta, at least for as long as Collins had known him. Alexia was sipping her Shirley Temple, and doing a pretty good job of sprinkling some of it on her napkin.

At least she wasn't making some snide remark like Mimi. Alexia really didn't do that, to Mark at least. He'd heard her spout off to Roger a few times, but it was easy to tell that the musician wasn't her favorite person in the world. Collins knew who was.

And, as for the professor, ever the vegetarian, he was going to have the Shoe Peg Corn an Peanut soup with a Chef's salad, hold the meat.

"Um, excuse me, Miss, my soup's cold."

The waitress sat Roger's cheeseburger down in front of him and then turned back to Maureen. "Ma'am, it Vichyssoise. It's supposed to be cold."

Alexia laughed a little as Joanne said, "I thought you knew what it was."

Maureen poked at a potato floating by in her cold soup with her spoon, "Yeah, it's just, every time I've ever had it, It was hot."

The waitress sat Alexia's linguine down and looked at her strangely. "I'm sorry, but, I know you from somewhere." she said, and Alexia looked at Mark and then averted her eyes. _Great. Being recognized for be a senator's daughter, again._

Mark scooted his chair closer to Alexia, "She'd really like not to-"

"You're Susan!" The waitress cried, drawing immense attention to the Bohemian's table.

Alexia looked surprised. "You...you saw the play?" she said slowly. _She saw the play! She's recognizing me for something **I've **done. Finally!_

"Yeah! I saw the preview last week! It was amazing!" the younger girl said. Mark nonchalantly put his arm around Alexia's waist, pulling her closer to him. The waitress continued, "That song, about the Green Dress was awesome, or when you sang that song about coming to your senses, it was awesome!" she pulled out her order taking pad, opened it to her program that she had obviously been showing off to her co-workers , and thrust it at Alexia. "Would you mind signing this for me?"

Her friends looked at her, and Mark handed her her purse so she could dig for a pen. After she found one, she looked up and saw Mark smiling broadly, Mimi looking excited, Collins looked calm and mature as usual. Roger was kind of surprised, and Maureen looked vaguely angry, as if no one had ever asked for _her _autograph. Joanne was trying to stifle laughter and her girlfriend's anger. Alexia signed the program beneath her name.

_Alexia Hemmingway_

"_Susan / Karessa"_

She handed the pad back to the eager waitress, who thanked her, and with the promise to return if they needed anything, happily left.

Alexia sighed. "Well, that was strange."

Roger looked over at Mimi, wishing he hadn't sat across the table from Mark and Alexia. He was starting to feel sick as Mark whispered something in Alexia's ear, and she giggled.

Maureen batted at the cell phone hanging from her belt loop, and began to feel quite nauseous herself. "Honeybear, I have to use the restroom." And, with that, she was gone into the old, saloon style, one stall bathroom with swinging white shutter doors.

"Attack of the Vichyssoise?" Alexia asked, leaning her head on Mark's shoulder.

Joanne nodded. "She can't say I didn't warn her."

"How was the cheeseburger, Rog?" Collins asked. He felt a lecture coming on.

"Really good. Great."

" I certainly hope so." Collins retorted "Some poor little cow died so you can quench your lust for beef."

Alexia was rethinking her position that Collins was possibly the most mature of the group. Sure, she fully respected his stance as a vegetarian, and didn't eat any meat in front of him, but, now, he was causing a scene. "How would you like it if you were a cow, happily grazing in a meadow somewhere and then some butcher comes by and-"

A polyphonic version of the Phantom of the Opera interrupted him. Joanne reached into her suit jacket and pulled out her cell phone. "Maureen?"

Mark saw Maureen's purse lying on the chair next to Alexia where Maureen had left it when she scampered into the bathroom. "Honeybear, I left my purse on my chair. It has my toilet paper in it." Mark heard through the phone. Maureen always yelled while she was on the phone, as if the person on the other end couldn't hear her. He was fairly certain the entire restaurant heard.

"I'll bring it back to you." Joanne hung up and turned to Alexia. "Can you hand me Maureen's," she lowered her voice "toilet paper?"

Alexia chuckled and began digging through the bag, and the toilet paper popped out and fell on the Parquet wood floor, rolling away. The Bohemians just stared at it in shock. Here they were in a five star restaurant, rolling organic toilet paper across the floor.

Just as it rolled behind Roger and Mimi, a waiter, a tray full of exotic food held high above his head stepped on the roll, and was standing one moment, lying down in mid-air the next, and then flat on his back, his tray dowsing Mimi, who screamed, and Roger, who began using words that were not usually used in the Tavern. With an "Oh my God!" Joanne went to see it the waiter was alright.

The toilet paper was rolling toward another table, and Mark dove after it, crawling on his hands and knees. He didn't see where he was going and crawled right under a table where a thirty-something couple sat.

Mark saw the woman's white shoe, and thought that it was the roll. He grabbed it, and the woman began screaming. "Someone just grabbed my foot!" she shrieked.

Mark backed up quickly, realizing he had gone under a table. He smiled pathetically. "I'm sorry, I was just-"

The woman's husband stood up, picking Mark up by his collar. He let go and shoved Mark, much like a bully on an elementary school playground. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" the older man yelled, pushing Mark again. He stumbled backward and fell painfully on his back. "ANSWER ME!"

Alexia walked over to the man as Mark got up and tried to apologize again. "I'm sorry!"

The man raised his fist to punch Mark in the face, but Alexia caught it in mid-swing. "Excuse me is there a problem here?"

The man put his fist down. "Is he with you?"

"Yes."

"Well, then tell your boyfriend to keep his hands off my wife's foot."

Collins could see Alexia trying to remain calm. "Sir, that was an accident. If you look under your table, you'll find a roll of toilet paper-"

"Toilet paper, what kind of a sicko is he?" The guy yelled, and punched Mark square in the face.

Before anyone knew what was happening, Alexia had the guy pinned to the ground. She'd immediately slipped her foot behind the guy's right leg, and with a simple push on the chest, he was on the floor. His wife shrieked, and then turned to Alexia. "Keep him down there! He deserves it." she shouted to her husband. The woman kicked her foot as she stood up, kicking the toilet paper roll. It began to roll away again. This time, Joanne lunged for it. "He said it was an accident, and you go and make a scene like this!"

Alexia spoke to the man's wife, woman to woman "This isn't a scene, it's a whole production." Then she shouted to Mark, "Honey, are you alright?"

Mark didn't answer. "Mark?"

"I'm fine," he answered, "but his wedding ring hurt!" Alexia turned around to see Mark holding his water glass to his cheek, but even through the distortion caused by the water displacement, she could see a red mark that looked very painful.

Some other woman screamed as Joanne chased the toilet paper out from under another table, and a hostess fell over it this time, falling backward into the party of eight she was seating. They fell like dominoes, one on top of each other. Someone else putting her coat on felt the roll brush past her ankle, and screamed "RAT!"

Chaos erupted in the tavern, and to people in the park looking in through the glass walls, it looked like the "Mooing Riot" all over again.

"RAT!" Mimi shrieked and jumped up on her chair.

People were yelling, and the chef had run out of the kitchen, a frying pan in his hand, ready to squash the non-existent rodent. He charged forward and didn't see Joanne, still on all fours.

For a minute, he looked like he was flying. His frying pan fell out of his hand as he landed, and fell right on Roger's foot, who strung together a new stream of profanities as he stepped backward, knocking Mimi off of the chair.

Alexia got up off of the man who had punched Mark, to try and make her way back to the table and see if Mimi was alright. The man followed her, heading toward Mark, and Alexia heard him grumble above all the screaming, "Nobody touches my wife but me. He's in trouble now."

Before she knew what she was doing, Alexia had wheeled around and punched the man squarely in the nose, he stumbled backward into the emergency exit, and the door opened ever so slightly.

The fire alarm, and the sprinklers hissed on. Alexia even shrieked.

And, she turned just in time to see the now severely diminished roll make it's way right to the women bathroom door, run out of paper, and just the empty roll stop at Maureen's feet.

She knew Maureen's wrath would be almost as bad as the scene before her.

Collins's eyes were wide as everything just stopped. The restaurant was crammed with people sprawled on the ground, water soaked everything, and Maureen even stopped yelling about the no paper situation.

He raised his left hand in the air. "Check!"

Later back at the loft, Alexia stood over the stove, stirring the soup she'd made. Mark loved her, but he wasn't looking forward to eating her cooking, as he sat on the now slipcovered couch, holding a baggie full of ice to his cheek where he had been punched.

Everyone was sore, and tired, and hungry. So, when Alexia handed Roger his pink (to match the new mugs) bowl, she expected at least a nod in thanks. Instead, he sat the bowl down on the (newly replaced) coffee table, and stood up, looking very angry.

Alexia sat down on the couch next to Mark, as Roger began shouting. "I can't take it anymore! I CAN'T TAKE IT! Everywhere I look, I see the same thing! PINK!" Collins, Joanne and Maureen looked confused, Mimi looked angry, and Alexia and Mark didn't know what to think. "Everything is PINK! PINK BOWLS, PINK MUGS, PINK SHOWER CURTAINS! And not to mention, I can't even walk into the bathroom to find **MY** Girlfriend anymore! It's **HER**!" he pointed forcefully at Alexia. "It's all **HER FAULT**! She's got you around her finger Mark! You're like her little dog, doing whatever she says!" Alexia felt herself begin to cry. She loved Mark, and Roger's accusation was hurtful. Roger's pager beeped. "And now it's time for me to take my AZT! **GOOD NIGHT**!" He stormed out, and Alexia buried her face on Mark's shoulder as she cried.

Mark shouted after Roger "**JERK**!"

Roger flung open the medicine cabinet, and his angry scream made the others in the living room laugh as an avalanche of tampons pelted him.

Roger seeing Alexia in the shower? A restaurant fiasco? Roger making Alexia cry, and Mark calling him a jerk? What will happen next?

Find out as soon as I update.

Soon. Very soon.

TTYL

VivaLaVieBohemeA


	5. Chapter 4:It Was A Dark and Stormy Night

Disclaimer: I still don't own RENT. Jonathan Larson does. And there are lyrics from Stephen Sondheim's _Into the Woods_, in here if you can find them.

Authoress Note: Okay guys, bear with me here, I know it's **way **past Halloween, but I just thought this would be funny. Sorry this update took so long.

And, this chapter is for anyone who has ever freaked out in a haunted house, and lived to tell the tale. : )

A Season of Love

-VivaLaVieBohemeA

XXXX

Alexia made that face that she always made when she was seriously debating her sanity. Her brows knitted, her mouth a thin line, she was biting her lip and thinking.

Finally, looking percarioulsy at the steering wheel of her blue Mercedes, she spoke. "You know what, you guys go ahead. I don't think I'm going to go in. I don't do haunuted houses well."

Mark smiled at his girlfriend, and, while she blushed, Roger sounded scandalized. "Don't do haunted houses well?" the musician laughed. "What do you mean, 'don't do haunted houses well?'"

"I just, don't okay?" Alexia answered, shying away from revealing anymore.

After a short pause of silence, Maureen raised an eyebrow. "Sounds like there's long a story behind this one." Alexia mentally noted how evil Maureen was. "Care to share?"

"Not really."

"Oh, come on, it can't be **that **bad." Joanne gave her girlfriend a forbidding look.

"Oh, believe me, _it can_."

"What, did you pee yourself, or something?" Mimi ventured innocently.

Alexia rolled her eyes. "No, I didn't pee myself. I've only been into one, and I am **_never _**going in one again." She paused "I was thirteen, okay, almost fourteen, and my sister Stefanie had this new boyfriend, so she convinced my parents, my brother Arthur and I, I can't remember why my other brother, Jon, wasn't there, to meet her and this guy at the Mexican restaurant we used to hang out at all the time-"

"And your point is?" Roger asked rudely, tapping the watch that he seldom wore. "Come, we won't have time to see anything in there before they close."

"Roger, it's a haunted house," Mark said, looking more than just a little annoyed. What was Roger's problem?

"**Anyway**," Alexia continued, "So, here we were, we ate dinner, went to get ice cream, and then my sister gets the brilliant idea that we should all go to a haunted house. I was only thirteen, I had no idea what to expect, but I assumed it couldn't be _that _bad, so I went along." She shook her head. "I think my sister just wanted an excuse to hang on her new boyfriend. She really liked him, but then he cheated on her about six months after that and I can't even remember his name, except for the fact that my brother called him Mr. Stupid after that-"

"So, you were at the haunted house and?" Roger chided, eager for Alexia to finish her anecdote.

"Okay," Alexia didn't notice the note of sarcasm in Roger's voice. She went on. "So this haunted house we went to, it was like, one of the best in the nation at the time, all over the national magazines, and everything, but my mother kept telling me that it wasn't really that scary, and my brother said I could just hide behind him if I got scared. Like I said, I was thirteen, I didn't think that anything like that could scare me." Mark stifled a laugh, imagining his girlfriend at fourteen. She probably hadn't changed much, assuming that she was pretty mature for her age, and Mark could tell that she had been, even though they would have bouts of sophomoric immaturity now, sticking their tongues out at each other and such. "We get there, and my mom's taking pictures, doing the whole 'It's Alexia's first trip through a haunted house!' and 'Stefy has a new boyfriend, let's get pictures!' thing. I wasn't even nervous until my dad said he wasn't going in. My dad's a politician, **nothing **scares him."

"We waited in line for like an hour, there was this big group of high school kids in front of us, and they were hanging all over each other and kissing. It should have been a pretty good foreshadowing of how scary things were going to be in there. It was disgusting." She paused, getting her thinking back on track. "Anyway, after we paid our admission, we headed toward the bathrooms to go real quick so we wouldn't do what Mimi suggested, and there was this sign on the door that said 'Restrooms, please knock' in big red letters that look official, so my mom went and knocked, and this big guy that's make up was supposed to look like he was all, how can I put this," Alexia paused, attempting to come up with a comparison. "He looked like Johnny from _Arsenic and Old Lace_, I actually think I told him that, jumped out at us, and my sister screamed and jumped behind Pat, that was his name, Pat, and acted like she was _terrified_. It was hysterical, and I thought, hey, if this is what a haunted house is like, it's not bad, it's actually pretty funny."

"The guy shut the door and my mom knocked again, I remember her screaming some obscenity at the guy and saying if he jumped out again, she'd punch his lights out, and knowing my mother, she would. So, he let us pass, and then we were all geared up to go in."

"There was this really long, well lit staircase," Alexia continued, much to Roger's dismay. Mark casually around his girlfriend's shoulders as she continued. "And then these doors that looked like the ones at the community center, you know, like gymnasium doors, and they said "The Point of No Return" above them. My brother and I started singing that song from Phantom with that title," She smiled at Mark. The Phantom of the Opera was **their **musical. They'd seen it together quite a few times since they'd become a couple. "And Arthur made mom go in the front. He probably didn't want to admit it in front of Stef and I, but I think he was kind of, well, not so much scared as anxious, and Stef was behind her, then Arthur, and then I, and Pat was bringing up the rear. Thinking back on it, I bet Pat wanted to be in the back because he was probably scared out of his un-ironed pants. I wouldn't put it past that dope. He turned out to be a **_real_** piece of work."

"Anyway," Alexia continued, coming off of her tangent and back to her story, "So the doorman who looked like some gothic vampire dude opened the door for us, and then growled at my sister and stared at her rear end as we passed, and it was pitch dark except for a strobe light off in a corner somewhere. Arthur had a flashlight in his coat pocket and he took that out just in time for the first monster to jump out at us." Alexia stopped for a second, taking Mark's hand in hers. She squeezed it three times, and he squeezed her hand back, listening intently to his girlfriend's tale.

"I remember what that guy looked like. He kind of resembled one of those little green army men, you know what I'm talking about, the little kid's toys? That someone had left under a magnifying glass in the middle of June. His make-up was so well done that he really looked like his green features were just…melting off of his face. He shouted and growled, I screamed bloody murder and jumped behind my brother, grabbing onto his shirt and just cowering. I felt like someone had just pulled the floor out from under my feet, I was so scared. I just flipped out and started crying, and hid behind my brother for a few minutes, holding on to Arthur and closing my eyes, following behind him really closely. Nothing happened for a few minutes, and I started to get a hold of myself, after all, I was thirteen, not three, so I loosened my grip on my poor brother, I think I'd kind of been choking him I was holing onto his shirt so tightly. It was still pretty dark and maze-like, and my mom started just laughing. It was almost strange, but my mom can find humor in the **strangest **places, and she said that when she was young and used to go through these tunnels and you'd get going into them as they got smaller and smaller and soon you'd almost be crawling on your hands and knees, and right as she said that, she smacked into something and felt around. Sure enough, it was a tunnel we were going to have to crawl through. I started hanging on my brother again, afraid that another monster was going to mysteriously appear."

"Arthur started darting his flashlight around, saying it was Tinker Bell, as we stooped lower and lower into this tunnel, and it was getting thinner too, to the point where you couldn't really even move your arms too much, and right as Arthur, with quite a bit of effort, maneuvered his light so it was shining on the wall, another monster stuck it's head, and this monster had like a kind of pumpkin head with all of these sharp looking teeth and his hands had really long claw-like nails He was even scarier than the first guy, out of a little cut out window thingy, hissed right in my face and said 'No one makes it out of **my **tunnel alive Missy.' I knew it was all one hundred percent fake, that I was _completely _safe, but I wasn't thinking about that at the moment. I wasn't thinking about anything but getting my butt of that tunnel alive and out of that haunted house before that monster ate me. I screamed, Arthur screamed, Stef and Pat screamed and I think my mom even yelped, and we all took off, running as fast as we could in that little tunnel, just screaming the whole way."

"I flipped out when we made it into the next stairwell that led us to the next level of the place, and hid behind my brother the rest of the way through. I was so scared that night when I went to bed that I didn't sleep **at all**. I just kept running to the bathroom and I threw up five times." Alexia paused. "And that is why I'm not going in there."

Mark looked at the sign bearing the haunted house's name. "Honey, what was that place called?" He asked.

"I don't really remember," Alexia answered, "The Haunted Catacombs, I think."

Mark bit his lip. "Uh, honey, does that look familiar?" he pointed toward the sign.

Alexia gasped. "Oh crap."

The sign read **The Haunted Catacombs, under new management**.

XXXX

"I AM NOT GOING IN THERE! NO WAY!" Alexia shouted as Roger attempted to pull her out of her car. "LET ME GO!"

Mark put himself between his girlfriend and his best friend. "Roger, stop IT!" The filmmaker steeled himself, half expecting Roger to hit him. "She said she's not going!" he paused, "Why do you want her to go so badly, anyway?"

"So I can test her story out, see if your girlfriend's really that scared of these things. She'll punch a guy in the middle of the Tavern on the Green, but she cowers from a little monster." Roger playfully made chicken noises.

"Do you know how immature you are?" Alexia asked, clambering out of her car. Mark slid his arm around her waist and pulled her close. After a minute, she added, "Fine, if your daring me, I'll go." She gulped nervously. "I'll go."

And with that, Alexia and Mark turned and headed toward the looming haunted house, the chilled October air ruffling them, leaving the other two couples in their wake.

Standing in line, Alexia was still debating her conviction to prove Roger wrong. "You know, Collins is lucky that he had to go pick Angel up at the airport and couldn't come." She finished. "You and I should have gone with him. Actually, you and I should have gone to wherever Angel went."

Mark adjusted the army green strap of his messenger-style camera bag that hung over his shoulder. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"Oh, I have to go," she answered, "And prove to Roger the fact that I **was **terrified of this place as a teenager and that I'm fairly certain he'll flip out, too."

Mark laughed. He could see that happening. He pulled Alexia closer to him and she laid her head over on his chest, smiling. Mark would make sure nothing scared her. Mark would keep her safe.

Joanne spoke up. "Hey, Alexia, did they have a haunted forest when you went through this?"

Alexia reluctantly turned around to face her friend. "No, why?"

The lawyer pointed to an advertisement hanging on the warehouse wall nearby. "They do now. Look."

Alexia looked over at the brightly colored poster. _Great, _she thought as she handed the ticket counter attendant her admission fee, _even more bang for our buck_.

XXXX

The lit stairwell was still there, and Alexia felt shivers course through her as she stepped onto the white tiled floor, but it now gave way to two open doors that led out to the darkness of a forest that lay just outside. She clung as tightly to Mark as she could as he took his camera out of his bag, wound it and began filming.

"October 31st, ten p.m.," He said, "Eastern Standard Time, here we stand going into the woods."

Alexia laughed nervously. "_Into the Woods," _she sang sarcastically, "_Into the Woods then out of the Woods and home before dark."_

Mark turned the camera on himself. "Am I scared? No. I work for Alexi Darling. There is nothing here that could be more frightening than my boss." Alexia giggled, and Mark continued. "But, Roger has brought us here tonight, and I think he's trying to kill us." He joked in his narration, and turned the camera toward his roommate. "Are you Roger?"

"Am I what?"

"Trying to kill us."

"Ha Ha, very funny Mark." He paused and made a face at the camera. "This is all fake, all make-up and flashy lights. There's nothing here that can scare me, either."

They rounded a corner and entered into the edge line of the forest where the moonlight hung low, their only source of light brightening their path. Mimi pulled a lighter from the deep recesses of her handbag and flicked it open and then flicked it on as they entered the woods and the dense foliage blocked out any light that could have eased their fears.

"Mark, honey, maybe we should go back," Alexia began as a wolf's cry (that even she knew could have been a cheap recording, like one of those CDs that you can buy at one of those Halloween stores that pop up in an empty storefront just for the season and then is gone as soon as the first of November comes around) sounded in the distance. She clung tightly to her boyfriend, making Mark secretly smile at her closeness. "You know, I don't really care if Roger's right. Let him be right, who cares." She continued nervously, "I know I don't care."

"If you really don't want to do this, we can turn back." Mark pulled her even closer, and Alexia melted. She almost forgot about her fear of where they were. She was right, who cared?

Something rustled in the leaves behind Joanne and Maureen, who were oblivious to anything but each other. A few seconds and then the rustling stopped. The group pressed forward.

Roger slinked his way up behind Alexia and began humming the _Jaws _theme.

"Roger, shut up." Mark hissed in the relative silence. "That's not funny. How old are you, six?"

Roger kept humming, and before any of them knew what was happening, they were surrounded in the woods by an ever smaller growing circle of hideous clown-like monsters. The musician shrieked like a little girl and practically knocked Mimi down in his retreat from the group, breaking through the circle of monsters and disappearing into the thickness of the trees. "ROGER!" Mimi shouted, sounding more annoyed than frightened.

Mark chuckled. Alexia **was **right. Roger was even more afraid of these things than she was.

A clown walked right up to Joanne and growled. She just rolled her eyes. "Who did your make-up, your mother?" she asked, stomping her foot down quite forcefully on top of the monster's own foot, making it retreat in submission. It's fellow cohorts followed.

Maureen began applauding, and Mark, Alexia and Mimi soon followed. "Yay Honeybear!" Maureen shouted, "You showed them who's boss!"

Joanne took a slight, understated bow and the group, their numbers decreased by one, trudged on.

"Does anyone see Roger?" Mimi asked apprehensively, dodging a low hanging branch.

Mark squinted in the darkness, looking for the musician. He didn't see any movement, let alone Roger.

A spider rustled over the top of Alexia's foot, making her shriek. Clowns were bad, but spiders were almost worse. Almost. She flicked the arachnid off and pulled on the sleeve of her boyfriend's brown corduroy jacket. "Mark, a _spider _just crawled over my foot! A spider!"

XXXX

Alexia got herself under quick control, and let her vice like death grip on Mark go with a muted "Sorry." She was certain that she had probably been hurting her boyfriend's arm the whole time, but Mark cared too much about easing her fear of the haunted house to say anything. She kissed him sweetly on the cheek.

The filmmaker smiled. "What was that for?"

"For keeping me safe." She paused, "I love you."

"I love you, too." He answered.

The leaves rustled behind them again. A grizzly scarecrow-esq monster appeared, stepping in between Mark and Alexia. "Oh, how cute." It said, "Young love."

Maureen shrieked, and Mimi, now boyfriend-less, clung on to Joanne who held tightly to the quivering Maureen.

Then, Alexia did something she never thought she'd have the courage to do. She stepped right up to the monster and raised an eyebrow. "Cute, huh?" she said, her courage mounting, "That's more than can be said for you." The monster didn't move. "Now, I suggest you step away from my boyfriend, or I may be forced to hurt you."

Joanne mentally noted that Alexia's comebacks were a little more threatening than her own.

"No." The Scarecrow answered, grabbing Mark by the arm and holding him like a hostage.

Alexia crossed her arms and sighed, sounding bored. "Let go of him."

"No."

"I'll give you until the count of three," Alexia began, "One…" the monster didn't move. Mark almost had to laugh. What an absurd scene. Here they were, in a haunted house, acting like teenagers, and he was being held hostage by a guy in a demented Scarecrow suit, which his girlfriend was ready to hit. Absurd, it was, indeed.

"Two…"

The Scarecrow tightened his hostage like grip on Mark. _Ow, _he thought, _this guy's taking this a little **too** far_.

Alexia didn't like being provoked, especially not by some minimum wage wannabe in a Scarecrow suit. "Two and a half…" Why wasn't Joanne backing her up here? The monster didn't budge. "I warned you," Alexia said, "Three!"

Before Mark knew what was happening, Alexia had the Scarecrow impersonator on the ground, and she was leading him by the wrist away from the poor sap. "Come on!" she shouted.

This was shaping up to be quite an evening.

XXXX

"This is Mark Cohen reporting for Buzzline," Mark narrated, once again turning the camera on himself. "There's still no sign of Roger, and Alexia just beat up an evil Scarecrow that was trying to take me hostage." He wound the camera and turned it toward Alexia who flashed her best Barbizon-girl smile and waved, most of her fear alleviated.

Just as long as no more spiders came crawling along.

Alexia curtsied slightly. "Thank you, Thank you very much." She said, blowing Mark a kiss.

"Speaking of Roger," Mimi said, "Where could he have gone?"

Mark shrugged. "No idea."

Mimi sighed, exacerbated. "You know, you would think a guy as tough as he claims to be would be scared by a little clown."

"Well, as right as you may be, clowns are pretty scary." Maureen ventured.

"Well," Alexia added, "the bigger the man, the harder the fall."

"No," Joanne raised an eyebrow, "The bigger the man, the bigger the baby."

The all laughed until Mark suddenly held his finger to his lips in a _shh, don't say anything, I heard something _gesture.

_"What?_" Alexia mouthed silently. "_What's going on?" _

Mark leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "Something's going to pop out to our left, I think." He paused, "Don't scream."

Mark was wrong; the next monster came from the right.

Next thing she knew, Alexia was clinging to Mark, screaming as loudly as she could, and they were running, running as far and as fast as they could without the threat of a trip or a fall.

XXXX

The forest didn't so much end as stop, giving way to another brick building, one that Alexia recognized as the one she had gone through before. The Haunted Catacombs may have new management, but it sure hadn't changed much as far as she could tell. The looming forest was a horrifying touch, but as far as she could tell, that was the only change she'd noticed so far. The stark white stair cases whose walls were marred by planned graffiti saying such things as "Turn back NOW!" or "No one's ever lived to tell this tale…" She laughed half-heartedly. Here she was, an adult, a professional actress, a **_New Yorker_**, and this haunted house had her quivering like she was fourteen again. To tell the truth, Alexia was quite embarrassed on top of everything else.

But, if she was as embarrassed as she was, she couldn't imagine what Roger was feeling. Alexia laughed.

"Mark, honey, are you okay?" She asked when her boyfriend stopped suddenly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just reading some of this graffiti." The filmmaker answered, raising a blond eyebrow. "Wow, some of this stuff is pretty…uh…colorful." He pointed to one in particular.

Alexia approached him, and Mark slinked his arm around her waist. She smiled and read what Mark was pointing to.

**!$ YOU! **It read, and Alexia stifled completely cracking. "Nice." She said. "I don't think management put that there. People are paying to just be frightened, not cussed out with little asterisks."

Mark took out his camera and filmed the sayings on the wall. "Worse than the 11th Street Lot." He narrated.

Alexia fixed her hair. "How do I look?"

"Just fine." Mark said sweetly, pulling Alexia closer to him.

"Guys?" Roger's voice sounded apprehensively, appearing out of nowhere from around a corner, the knees of his jeans torn out and muddy, like the musician had fallen in his retreat. "Is that you?"

Mimi rushed forward, throwing her thin arms around Roger's neck, kissing him into submission. Alexia couldn't help but smile. But, her smile was quickly erased when Mimi remembered the fact that Roger had abandoned her in the forest, and slapped him flush across the face. Maureen and Joanne jumped back, looking quite frightened.

"Ouch!" The musician exclaimed, rubbing his reddening cheek. "What was that for?"

Mimi huffed like an angry bull. "For leaving me in that STUPID forest! Thanks A LOT!" And with that, she turned on her heel and tromped in through the gymnasium doors and into the next part of the haunted house. After a few seconds of silence, Mark and Alexia burst into laughter.

Roger turned to them, growing angrier and angrier. "It's nice to know you two think this is all funny."

That just made Mark and Alexia laugh even harder.

XXXX

The doors were ominously black and foreboding behind the stark white of the grim reaper doorman's robes. Mark took wound his camera and kept filming as Alexia steeled herself against the rush of fear that was threatening to overtake her. She jammed her hands in the pockets of her green jeans to hide their shaking. _Ah, _she thought, _just like being fourteen again._

The doorman wasn't moving, and Roger approached him first. "Hey, Mr. Doorman dude? Hellllllllllllooooooo?" The musician asked, waving his hand in front of the doorman's face.

No response.

Mark stepped up to the plate, so to speak, next. "Um, hi. Look, we're just trying to get into the next part of the haunted house, so, if you wouldn't mind, maybe you could let us in?"

No response.

Alexia sighed, annoyed and crossed her arms as she approached the doorman herself. "Look, I've had it up to HERE with this place and you people, so if you don't let us pass before I count to five, I may have to hurt you. One..."

The doorman looked up, staring at Alexia with dull, white eyes. "YOU may enter."

And with that, he swung his sicle aside and allowed the group to enter, going past the point of no return.


	6. Chapter Five: Pressing Onward

Disclaimer: Still don't own it. Never will.

Authoress Note: Thanks again for all the reviews! They make a great day even better!

-VivaLaVieBohemeA

XXXX

"We continue," Mark narrated, turning his camera slowly on each member of the mismatched group that, miraculously, was still pressing on into the Haunted Catacombs, "It's still Halloween," he brought his watch up into view, "But barley. It's now eleven thirty-five-"

"Don't remind me." Alexia interjected.

"That's for sure." Mimi added, "I have work tomorrow. I have to be there at nine." She rolled her eyes. The breakfast shift at her new waitressing job at the Life almost made her miss her old dancing days at the Catscratch. At least the clientele there had been wealthy enough to tip. Mark and Alexia were the only ones at her new job that did, and it embarrassed Mimi.

Maureen rubbed her hands together for warmth, a motion very familiar to Mark and Roger. "It's freezing in here!" She said, cuddling close to Roger who stepped away, quite frightened for the second time that night.

"God Maureen, how cold are you?" Mark asked, turning the camera on her.

"Try Leonardo DiCaprio in the last part of Titanic." Maureen quipped in answer, finding Joanne and snuggling closer to her. Alexia tisked at the bad reference to her favorite non-musical movie.

"That wasn't very funny Maureen." She added.

Maureen glared at Alexia. "Well, I thought it was."

"It wasn't, I assure you."

Mark stepped between his girlfriend and Maureen. "Okay girls, that's enough." _Think fast Cohen, think fast._ "We uh...need to stay sharp so we can...watch for monsters?" _Well, that was lame._

"That was brilliant, Mark." Roger added, not helping the situation any.

"This is coming from the guy that wears a leather jacket and then screams like a little girl and runs away from a bunch of _clowns_?" Joanne asked, pulling Maureen closer to her.

"Hey! Hey!" Roger answered, insulted. "Clowns are scary!"

Alexia raised an eyebrow. "You know what Roger, for the first time in history, I think I actually agree with you."

Mark just shook his head. _This is a waste of film_, he thought, and then corrected himself, looking around, _Nothing's a waste of film when were together. Too bad Collins and Angel didn't come. Angel would have kicked some monster in the face with her high-heels by now._

Mark just had to laugh at the absurdity of the series of mental images that suddenly popped into his head.

A monster jumped out at them from the left, and next thing Mark knew, Alexia was clinging tightly to him, her scream still ringing in his ears. Maureen looked the monster in the face. It was a hideous one, it's decayed features melted into oblivion, the nose completely gone, showing only bare bone and cartilage. "I'd make out with you!" Maureen teased, to show that she wasn't afraid, always trying to outdo her friends.

Joanne grabbed Maureen's arm and yanked her away from the monster. "No you won't!"

&&&&

They were plunged into darkness once again, and somehow, Mimi found herself in front with Roger behind her, and then Mark and Alexia, Maureen and lastly Joanne. Roger had somehow regained some of his confidence, but Alexia was still terrified, holding on to Mark like there was no tomorrow. Mimi bumped into a wall and turned to her right where she hit another hard surface. The left finally let her pass.

Headlights came out of nowhere, causing Alexia to scream as Mark knocked her out of the way, and, accidentally, into the waiting arms of a monster. As the vampire dragged her off, the van screeched to a halt inches away from the rest, a monster flinging it's self out of the windshield and growled at Mark.

A roundhouse kick landed on the monster's face, and everyone looked to where it had come from.

Mimi straightened back up, and the others looked on in surprise. "What?" she asked. "I'm flexible."

&&&&

"LET ME GO!" Alexia shrieked for the second time that night, trying to dig her heels into the hard floor to no avail as the vampire dragged her away from the group. A door spun shut behind them, further separating her from her friends and from Mark.

"You're coming with me little lady." The vampire hissed, picking up its speed.

"I'll sue!" Alexia cried, her voice shaking with fear. Mark would rescue her, he was her knight in shining armor, after all. Okay, knight in shining armor with a Bolix camera. Time to do something Alexia never thought that she would stoop to. "Do you know who my father is?" she asked, angrily.

&&&&

Benjamin Coffin III pricked up his ears. The voice he hear shrieking sure sounded like his cousin. But what would Alexia be doing in a haunted house? She hated haunted houses, if his memory served him right, and even if it was her, who cares? She, in a pretty dirty (if he said so himself) business move had purchased Mark and Roger's building out from underneath him. If it was her screaming, good. Let her be scared. She deserved it.

"Do you know who my father is?" Benny heard the all-too-familiar voice shout at whoever was holding her captive.

Benjamin Coffin III rolled his eyes. It **was **his cousin he heard screaming.

For some reason he found his feet carrying him to the sound of Alexia's screams. He'd lost Alison somewhere in the forest and had yet to find her, maybe Alexia had seen her. Or, maybe if Benny helped her out of whatever situation she'd managed to get herself into this time, maybe, just maybe she'd agree to sell him the building back.

Benny strongly doubted it, but it was worth a try.

&&&&

Mark slammed his shoulder against the revolving wall, trying to get it to budge. "OPEN THE DOOR!" He bellowed, slamming the door again, this time with the help of Roger and Joanne. Maureen was surprised at the volume and ferocity of Mark's voice, and on the third hit, she and Mimi joined in, making the door finally give way, sending them spinning into a circular room full of mirrors and several different doors.

_Where had that vampire pulled her off to?_

&&&&

Alexia was still kicking and screaming when she heard the door spin behind her. "Let go of her!" Mark shouted, knocking the vampire aside with a particularly strong (especially for Mark) punch right to the guy's face. Alexia pulled herself away, and grabbed Mark's hand, running as far from the vampire as she could. The others followed, and Alexia and Mark fell backward onto them when they ran smack dab into someone.

The gang were on their feet almost immediately, and as Mark straightened his glasses, he saw something that was defiantly more frightening than anything he had previously seen in the evening:

Benny.

Alexia shrieked and Roger pulled himself up to his full height. "Benjamin Coffin the third." He hissed.

"What are you doing here?" Mark questioned as Alexia loosened her grip on his arm, which Mark was very thankful for. He just couldn't say _Honey, you're breaking my arm._ That wouldn't be very suave or charming.

"Looking for Alison." Benny answered curtly. "What are **you all** doing here?"

"Well," Maureen answered. "It's Halloween, and we came to a haunted house. It's not illegal."

Alexia rolled her eyes. "Benny, are you sure your not working here? I saw some monsters that looked like you back there."

"Ha ha. That is so funny I forgot to laugh." Benny answered coolly. "I see you managed to get away from whatever had you screaming back there Alexia."

Alexia smiled, masking her anger. "Mark rescued me." She added with a soft kiss to her boyfriend.

Benny began laughing. The others just looked on, completely confused. "What's so funny?" Roger demanded.

It took Benny a few moments to get himself under control. "It's just- it's just I never thought I'd see the day when Mark, skinny, pale Mark, rescued somebody. Especially Alexia, who used to be able to rescue herself! See, she gets a boyfriend and she turns into Mary Jane, always needing rescued!"

Alexia showed Benny her favorite finger and they left him standing there, laughing like a loon. As they left, Mark asked, "Am I really that pale?"

&&&&

At LaGuardia Airport, Angel climbed into the passenger seat of Collins's new car.

"Did you have fun in LA?" He asked.

"It was LA baby." Angel answered. "I'm just glad to be back in New York." She then paused, looking around and realizing that it was just she and Collins in the car. "Where's everybody else?"

"They all went to some haunted house," Collins answered, "They were going to wait, but I told 'em to go ahead, I know how much you hate those things."

Angel shuddered. "Gracias." Then she paused. "I'll bet poor Alexia's not having such a good time."

"Why?"

"She hates those things, too. I'll bet she's clinging to poor Marky like grease on a skillet."

Collins laughed. If that was the case, then Mark was having a **wonderful** time.

&&&&

They were thrust into darkness again, and Mimi felt the ground begin to shake under her boots. Something was coming, but she had no idea what.

Joanne sighed and rolled her eyes. _This is the last time I EVER go through one of these,_ she looked ahead at Mark and Alexia and then Roger and Mimi, _especially with the kissing brigade._

Candelabras burned bright ahead and Mimi gently nudged Roger. "Candles." She whispered "Roger, it's like they knew we were coming!"

Roger smiled, hiding his nerves. "Yeah, I guess so."

"Hey guys? Are we swinging?" Maureen asked nervously.

"W-what?" Alexia asked, her grip once again turning vice-like on Mark's hand.

"Like one of those bridges, you know, the swinging ones that are on those cables that don't really swing that much but you can DEFIANTLY tell that they're moving?" Maureen finished.

Mark pulled out his camera and looked through the viewfinder. His brow furrowed as he answered. "We are most certainly moving. How'd we not feel that?"

Mark was busy putting his camera away, and as he closed the silver latch on his camera case, he handed the bag to Alexia. "Here, can you hold this for a sec? If something jumps out at us, I want to be able to keep Roger from running away again."

Alexia smiled at her boyfriend as she slipped the army green strap over her shoulder.

"HEY!" Roger shouted, scandalized and then erupted in a string of obscenities as the bridge below them began swinging violently

A monster appeared out of nowhere, and latched it's fingers around Mark's ankle, pulling him down.

"OUCH!"

&&&&

ALEXIA'S POV

Wow, I've never hear my boyfriend swear like that.

And, by the look on Roger's face, he hadn't either.

"Mark, are you alright?" I asked, worry taking over my voice, making it quiver.

Another obscenity. "I think something's broken!"

"WHAT?"

"I can't move my-OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

A nearby monster leaned in toward me, and said in a human voice. "Is he okay?"

I rolled my eyes at Mr. Monster-man. "I don't know, I can't see anything!"

The guys touched his ear like a secret service agent talking into their earpiece. "We need the lights up in B-6, we have a possible injury."

A few seconds later, lights buzzed on in the distance and then rapidly approached, and even though they shed _some _light in the room, it still wasn't sufficient enough to see any further than, oh, I don't know, three feet in front of your face, or so. "Mark?" I called.

Another string of obscenities met my call. "Mark?"

&&&&

Four hours and several x-rays later, Mark emerged from the emergency room on crutches with an ace bandage wrapped expertly around his right ankle.

"Marky!" Alexia immediately cried, jumping to her feet and kissing him.

Roger, who had fallen asleep somewhere around one o'clock snored loudly, waking up Mimi, who was asleep as well, her head on Roger's shoulder, as Joanne grabbed a wheelchair from the nearby nurses' station. Mark smiled gratefully and sat down, and Mimi elbowed Roger in the ribs to wake him up.

Alexia spoke after she kissed Mark again. "So, nothing's broken?"

Mark shook his head. "No. It's just a bad sprain."

Alexia sat on Mark's lap, throwing her arms around his neck, her crystal bracelets catching the bright fluorescent light and scattering it, and swung her legs away from her boyfriend's sore ankle. "How about we go home?"

"That'd be good Lexi." Mark answered, sliding his arms around her waist.

Joanne sighed, annoyed. "Look, I can only push one of you." Mark and Alexia just ignored her. "ALEXIA! GET UP!" Joanne finally shouted, sending Alexia spiraling to the floor. As she got up and brushed herself off, Joanne finished. "No, let's move out!"

&&&&

After Roger helped Mark up the stairs to the loft, Alexia and Maureen slid the steel door back, revealing Collins and Angel waiting patiently on the couch, Collins with a paper cup filled with Stoli in his hand.

Angel took one look at her disheveled friends, Mark's crutches and bandaged ankle, and spoke simply. "Well, it, uh, looks like you guys had fun."

&&&&

Mark with a sprained ankle? Angel back from LA? Alexia giving Benny the finger? Roger afraid of clowns?

What will happen next?

Find out as soon as I update. Which will be soon, because I have next week off for Spring Break, so I'll try to do a chapter a day. : )

A Season of Love,

VivaLaVieBohemeA


	7. Chapter Six: Meet the Siblings

Disclaimer: I still don't own RENT.

Authoress Note: Thanks for the reviews! I hope the haunted house was realistic enough, I've only been through one, but I had help from a lot of friends and family who shared their experiences. A special thanks goes out to them.

Okay, and this chapter is mostly about introducing my OC's family. They'll be a lot more of our favorite Bohemians in the next chapter, I promise!

Spring break has arrived, and I'll be writing a lot more now: )

A Season of Love,

-VivaLaVieBohemeA

&&&&

Alexia flipped open her new copy of Vogue, and Mimi sat next to her, reading it as well. "Well," she said, pointing to a particularly distasteful layout showing a low cut, high skirted red dress, "That's slutty."

Alexia nodded. "Tell me about it. Sometimes I wonder if these editors got into Collins' stash." She sipped her tea and then added, "You know what Tuesday is, don't you?"

Mimi raised an eyebrow and looked at Alexia quizzically. "No, should I?"

Alexia looked away. "Lincoln Center."

Mimi didn't know what she was talking about at first, but then she remembered. "Oh my god! Don't you have rehearsal or something? Don't you have to get outta here?" She said quickly and very loudly.

Alexia shushed her friend. "Shh, yeah, but I don't want to wake Mark up. His ankle is still really bothering him." A few guitar chords in the distance told the girls that Roger was awake in he and Mimi's bedroom. Alexia smiled. "I don't know if I've told you guys this, I know Mark knows, but you two might not," She began slowly, "I really love living here. You guys really are like family, you, Roger, Angel, Collins, Mo, Jo, all of you."

Mimi hugged her friend, who, over the past few months had become like a sister. "Well, we love that you live here. **And, **we, Roger and I, and the rest of us, love how happy you and Mark are together. Really, you two are so perfect for each other."

Alexia blushed. "Thanks Meems." The alarm clock from Mimi's room sounded, and Alexia looked at the clock that read twelve o'clock noon, which meant that it was really nine. Alexia stood, passed Mimi her magazine, and grabbed her coat. "And now, I have to go, can you tell Mark where I went? I have to go to the airport before I go down the theater."

Mimi closed the magazine. "Why?"

Alexia shook her head forlornly. "My sister's coming into town."

&&&&

When Stefanie Tuck-Jones-Smith-McMullen-Hemmingway saw her sister coming, she had to take off her white rimmed Louis Vuitton sunglasses to make sure that it was her. Alexia had a sly smile on her lips, her calf-length, hot pink coat moved gracefully whenever she did, and her brown hair was pulled half back with a clip in a flourish that had a nice wave to it.

Her sister's appearance hadn't changed, but her demeanor had. Either her sister had just been nominated for some kind of award, or she was in love. It was the same thing that Stefanie had noticed herself when she saw her first design in Nordstrom's, and when she met her first husband. The other's hadn't been much to write home about, except for a fun weekend in Florida that went a little further than it should have. (It hadn't lasted long, either. Clocking in at seven hours, it was the shortest marriage that Stefanie had ever found herself in. Barely.)

Alexia dashed toward her sister and flung her arms around the older girl's neck. "Stefy!" She shouted and then looked around. "Where's Pat?"

&&&&

ALEXIA'S POV

We found out last September that my sister has a thing for Irish guys. Her fifth husband, Patrick McMullen was a blond with green eyes who actually kind of resembled Roger. He spoke with a brogue, and yes, yes, he was the Pat that had cheated on Stef in high school, but, he spent a few years in Ireland, picked up the accent, and she fell for him all over again when she ran into him right after she'd moved to Detroit. We'd all assumed it was fate.

But, now he wasn't here for my Lincoln Center show, and I assumed that Stefanie had just done what she did with every other husband of hers (there've been four more, really. She's quite the man eater. Like Audrey II...grrrr! A talking plant with a lust for blood! That character must have been written with my sister in mind! Just ask her first four husbands). She'd probably divorced him.

The way my sister's eyes darted around, I already knew that I was right. She'd divorced Pat. "Stef! Not again!"

&&&&

Mark threw back the covers and stepped out of bed before he remembered that he'd severely sprained his ankle the night before. He winced in pain before laying back down. "Uh, someone?"

&&&&

ALEXIA'S POV

I would have crossed my arms if I hadn't been driving. "Stef, what is this, husband number twenty-two?"

"Oh get serious." Stefanie retorted, staring intently at a group of workmen about her age working in a hotel driveway. Ah, my sister the wandering eye. "Pat was only the fifth!"

"Only the fifth?" I cried, "Only the fifth! Stefanie, I've never even had a serious boyfriend before now!"

Stef played with her cell phone, and blew a bubble with her obnoxiously blue gum and popped it, making me swerve a little. "So that's what it is." She smirked. "I thought so."

"What what is?" I asked, thoroughly confused, as I usually am in my sister's presence. "What did you think?"

"Well, you've changed."

"I've what?"

"Do you remember how I was when I first met Greg?" She said, turning toward me. Oh god, Greg, her first husband.

"Yes?" I replied, half answering, half questioning, paused, and then added, frightened. "Should I be afraid?"

She beamed. "No silly!" I rolled my eyes. Oh my god. I **should** be afraid.

Very afraid.

You see, the reason that I should be afraid is that my sister's first husband had been a dramatic critic. The second Stef saw him, she was head over way-too-expensive high heels. I, on the other hand, wasn't so impressed. A dramatic critic reviewing Arsenic and Old Lace, what, didn't he have some other off-off-Broadway play that he could ridicule? No, no, apparently he had nothing better to do with his time than poke fun at a classic which, coincidentally, is about a drama critic and his two kindly, old, and psychotic aunts who poison possible boarders with Elderberry wine and then bury them in their basement. (It's a comedy, I swear.)

But, Stef had fallen for him, and fallen hard. Even though he gave the play, and my performance as Elaine a lousy review ("Miss Hemmingway's performance is lackluster, her place is in musical theater, where songs can rescue a performance from her inability to show emotion in her role. She's supposed to be a saucy preacher's daughter, but I say that she's just the former, a preacher's daughter. No sauce to save this pasta." Whatever that meant. Well, at least that was the only lousy review we got. Everyone else seemed to think I was fine. But, no, my sister couldn't have married one of **those** critics.) Stef agreed to meet him for dinner the next evening.

And the next.

And the next.

And before we knew it, Stef and Greg were engaged, and married, and then even faster than that, the were divorced. But, there was no denying that they had been happy together in the beginning, and back then, my sister was giddy all the time, blushing at the mention of Greg's name.

I bit my lip. Just like me with Mark.

"Well," she continued, "Your all," she paused, trying to find the right words, "happy."

I pretty much knew where she was coming from, but I wasn't completely sure. "What?" I asked, becoming even more confused than before. "Am I usually not happy?"

She popped that stupid gum again, and I considered opening the car door and throwing her out, getting all cell-block-tango-girl from Chicago on her rear, but she is my big sister, and may have actually been paying me a compliment on top of the fact that I'm driving and would have to take my hands off the wheel, eyes off the road and lean clear across her to open her door, and then undo her seatbelt to shove her out, so I decided against it. "Well, no, that came out wrong, I guess. You're happy, but you used to be such a career woman."

I rolled my eyes as we pulled into crawling traffic back into the city. It would be quite a while before I could get out of such close proximity with my sister.

Somebody, please, save me. Mark!

&&&&

Back at the Loft, Mimi walked into Mark's doorway and smiled sympathetically. "Hey Mark." She said. "Alexia went to pick her sister up at the airport."

Mark sat up in bed. "Ah, she warned me about her."

Mimi leaned against the doorway. "What? Is she the overprotective big sister?"

Mark shook his head. "Apparently not. She's supposedly quite the man's lady."

"Mark, you're making no sense." His roommates girlfriend said.

Mark stopped for a second, trying to put his thoughts into a sentence. "Well, Alexia said that she's on her fifth husband."

Mimi laughed. "Did they give you pain medication for you ankle last night? Is that why you're so loopy this morning?"

Mark raised a blond eyebrow. He really couldn't remember himself. "I don't think so..." He said, trailing off. "Umm, well, anyway, Alexia said that she's been married four time before, and divorced four times and now she's married to husband number five."

Mimi had to laugh. If all that was true, Alexia and her sister were polar opposites.

&&&&

ALEXIA'S POV

"A career woman?" I asked, "Since when is there anything wrong with that?"

"There's nothing wrong with that!" Stef retorted, "It's just, you were always the one that, you know, was never interested in having someone."

I rolled my eyes again as we crawled further along in the traffic. "I was too busy!"

Stef shook her finger at me. "That's **exactly **what I meant." She said. "You're always at the theater! Not that there's anything wrong with that, but, you just never had a serious boyfriend. But, apparently you do now." She smirked. "So, spill."

I set my coffee back in my drink holder near the dashboard and my car phone. "Spill what, my coffee?"

Stefanie sighed and now it was her turn to roll her eyes. "Oh shut it. You know what I meant. Who is he?"

I glanced out the window, knowing that Stef would be sizing up Mark in her head, probably considering if he was good enough for **her** to date if things went south with he and I. Yeah right, no way. Sorry Stef.

We weren't moving, and short of jumping out of my car and running back to the loft, I had no choice but to give into my sister's demands.

&&&&

"He sounds perfect for you Alexia." Stef said, patting out the rhythm to the song from _Oklahoma!_ that poured through my car stereo, twenty minutes later, after I had told her how perfect Mark was, how handsome, such a gentleman, such an artist.

Did my sister, the man-eater just say something positive about the opposite sex? I shook me head, certain that I'd heard wrong. It just wasn't possible.

But, by then traffic was finally moving, and Stef's cell phone rang so I didn't say anything snarky in response.

"Hello? Oh, I was wondering when you were going to call. No stupid, I'm not still at the airport, yeah, Alexia came and got me. Okay." She pushed her cranberry colored cell phone at me. "Someone wants to talk to you."

I sigh, only slightly annoyed and take her phone. "Hello, you're talking to Alexia."

"Sis!" To distinctly frightening male voices said over the line.

Oh my god, could today get any worse!

&&&&

Arthur Hemmingway was a very intimidating man. At six foot five, he not only could threaten possible thieves in his casino with the gun concealed in his shoulder holster, but he could just come near them, casting a shadow on the ground near their feet, and palm carders and two-bit cheaters would be running scared. But, Arthur Hemmingway was terrified by the fact that his baby sister had a serious boyfriend, a **filmmaker**, from the East Village.

But, his brother, Jon Hemmingway, a psychotherapist who stood at six foot two, and who had a nice, trusting demeanor, who would never hurt a fly, on the other hand, couldn't be happier. Alexia finally had someone.


	8. Chapter Seven: Lunch

Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine.

Authoress Note: Thanks again for the reviews, I hope Alexia's family isn't too crazy!

Season of Love,

-VivaLaVieBohemeA

&&&&

Maureen and Joanne were engaged in their daily fight, and they seemed to think that Mark could settle it. "Isn't it enough that I scratch her every itch?" Joanne asked the frightened filmmaker who just sat on the couch, wide eyed.

"I never ask you to scratch my back!" Maureen shouted back. "That's when I call Angel!"

Mark sighed and put his head in his hands, not hearing the phone ringing.

"SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAK!"

"Marky, I know you're there, pick up the phone...Mark?" Alexia's voice called into the loft. Mark attempted to jump to his feet, but his sprained ankle prevented that, so

he shouted into the distance, realizing that Maureen and Joanne were way too engrossed in themselves to be of any help.

"Roger, get the phone!"

Mark heard a crash and then a yelp. "Get it yourself!" The musician called from his bedroom.

"Do the words 'sprained ankle' mean anything to you?" Mark shouted back, and Roger unwillingly emerged from his bedroom, setting his guitar down on the stand as he approached the phone.

"Honey, I know you're there, please pick up the phone, Marrrrrrrrrkyyyyyyyyyy?"

Roger scooped up the receiver. "Hey, Alexia."

"Roger, put Mark on."

"Oh, what?" The musician teased, "You don't want to talk to me?"

"No."

"Ouch Alexia." Roger said, "That hurt."

"Roger, please, just let me talk to Mark."

Roger rolled his eyes and tossed the phone to Mark, who, for once, caught it. "Alexia, honey, what's wrong?"

Ducking away from her sister, Alexia whispered "Everything. Stef's here, and my brothers are coming too."

Mark smiled. "Yay, I get to meet your siblings!" _Next step, meeting her parents,_ Mark thought.

Alexia sighed. "If your saying yay, then you clearly have never met them."

&&&&

ALEXIA'S POV

After a few seconds of small talk, arranging to meet for lunch and the like, I hung up my cell phone, and, upon hearing my brother Jon coming, I attempted to take refuge behind my car, hoping that he wouldn't see me.

No such luck.

"ALEXIA!" My brother shouted playfully and picked me up clear off the ground in a hug, before setting me back down embarrassedly. "Sorry." He said, attempting to straighten my coat. I slapped his hand away in true Hemmingway-family fashion.

"Don't worry about it." I hugged my brother. "Jon, oh, it is **so **good to see you!" I looked around. "Where's Arthur?"

Stef approached behind us. "Oh, our other degenerate brother? He went to rent a car for while we're here, he'll met us at your apartment after lunch.

My eyes grew wide, and I hoped with all I was worth that Roger and Mimi weren't home when Arthur turned up at the Loft. Well, maybe they could be home, but I certainly hoped that they weren't **together**.

"How does he know where I live?" I asked, wondering if I'd even actually told my brother that I'd moved in with Mark. Come to think of it, I hadn't talked to Arthur in so long, he might not even know who Mark is. Whoops.

Stefanie waved a brightly colored map in front of my face. "Mapquest is a wonderful thing." She paused and bit her lower lip. "We were kind of shocked to see that the address is in the East Village, though."

"The center of Bohemia." I rationalized, and my sister just rolled her eyes.

&&&&

Later, after we had been ushered by my brother into California Pizza Kitchen (who, ironically had restaurants all over the nation, even in New York), and had been seated with exceptional speed, I found myself sitting on one side of the table all by myself and facing the inquisition that was known as Stef and Jon, and hoping that Mark would arrive soon to rescue me from my own siblings.

I twirled a piece of hair around my finger and stared at the table in front of me, wishing that we were at the Life. I know my way around that place, could excuse myself to use the little girl's room, and then slip out on of the back doors before I'd even ordered. No such luck, and they were my family, so I was pretty much stuck at the table.

"So," Jon began, attempting to start conversation, "tell me about this boyfriend."

I glared at Stefanie who smirked and waved a little at me for shear effect. I looked back to my brother. "What do you want to know?"

"Well, like," I could tell that my brother was trying to sound polite. "Where does he work?"

I glanced to the front of the restaurant, hoping that Mark would appear and help me dig myself out of this hole known as lunch with Stef and Jon.

"Alexia?" Jon asked, waving a hand in front of my face. I must have been looking toward the entrance longer that I thought I had.

"Oh, yeah, sorry." I said, blinking my eyes a few times attempting to remember what my brother had asked me. Where Mark works, that's right. (I also noticed how my brother and sister were more concerned about my love life than my Lincoln Center performance, where it should have been the other way around. I was fine, **better than fine**, in my love life, but my career really had me nail-biting lately. Lincoln Center was bigger than Broadway, almost.) "Well, he's an independent filmmaker, but he does some freelance work for _Buzzline._"

Jon snapped up straight in his chair. "_Buzzline?_ As in _Buzzline_ hosted by Alexi Darling?" I nodded, being reminded quite harshly how close my name was to that of Mark's boss, also known as Satan. "Oh, she's so HOT!" Jon exclaimed.

I turned away. "You've clearly never seen her without her make-up."

Before Jon could answer, I spotted Mark entering the restaurant on his crutches, so I excused myself from the table, and dashed over to him, greeting my boyfriend with a kiss. "How's you ankle?"

Mark responded with an "Ow."

I kissed him again. "Let's go sit down then."

We walked back to our table, and before I could say anything, Stef spoke up. "SO, this is Mark? We've heard **so** much about you!"

&&&&

Mark Cohen didn't know wither he should be frightened or relieved that Alexia's sister and her one brother seemed so friendly. On one hand, he was glad. No sister giving him the evil eye, or brother threatening to kill him if he broke his sister's heart.

Mark shook his head slightly. He was only meeting **one** of Alexia's brothers.

&&&&

Arthur Hemmingway was tapping his Visa on the desk of the car rental service that had been recommended to him by a friend at the casino. He'd demanded a Mustang, something that he wouldn't be ashamed to drive, unlike that blue thing that his sister drove. It was the saddest excuse for a Mercedes Arthur had ever seen, and on many an occasion, he'd suggested that Alexia get rid of it and get a more suitable car, a Lincoln of a Rolls. She'd stubbornly dismissed his best natured intentions and kept her car, polishing it only occasionally. Sure, it wasn't older than five years, but it was small and, in Arthur's opinion, un-pretty. Not so much ugly or unattractive as just not-gorgeous. And Arthur Hemmingway's little sister should be driving something prettier.

She also shouldn't be dating a **filmmaker** from the **East Village**, but he apparently didn't have any say in that matter. "And this is your business how?" Arthur's mother had asked when he called her to tell her that he was indeed flying in from Vegas to see Alexia's Lincoln Center performance.

"Well," Arthur said, trying to defend himself. "I'm her big brother! I'm just trying to protect her!"

"And how can you tell that this Mark isn't a perfectly fine, upstanding guy?" His mother retorted.

"I don't." Arthur answered, defeated.

Arthur usually had an answer for everything, and it bothered him the entire time that he drove to the Ritz, and the entire time that he walked up the six flights of stairs to the suite that he had reserved.

&&&&

Roger chuckled as he sat on the couch back at the Loft. He didn't envy Mark (he knew from experience with Mimi's family that big brothers could be very frightening when you were dating their little sister), but he wondered no less what it would be like to be in his shoes, he wondered what would have happened if he had met Alexia at CGBG's instead of April on that night that seemed like a lifetime ago...

_Twenty-four year old Roger Davis had missed three chords in the current song alone, watching her like he was._

_She sat in the back, at the bar, a Cosmopolitan in her hand, the hot pink of the drink matching her overcoat and sequined scarf. Her attitude seemed flip at best, almost yuppie at worst. She had a look in her dark brown eyes that said that she would rather be anywhere else in the world than where she was, like maybe she'd come here as a last ditch effort to feel artistic again after a day of Corporate America. She looked disinterested in the scene before, just sipping her drink, hoping a buzz might clear her conscious of whatever she'd done during the day, and Roger guessed by the look of her that she was a lawyer. She had the casual I-don't-care-buzz-off air and the expensive handbag slung over her shoulder. Roger mused that she was probably a prosecutor who might have put someone away that she knew in her heart and soul was innocent, but she couldn't have thrown the case, lost on purpose, no, no, no. A loss wouldn't look good on her case record. Her long dark hair that was pulled half-back cascaded over her shoulders with a slight curl in the bottom, as if even her hair was expensive._

_Roger's roommate, Mark, sat a few seats over from the girl, talking to another woman who looked a lot less Uptown and who looked a lot like the girls that Roger usually looked at in a place like CGBG'S. She had choppy, reddish hair that stuck out her and there like she could have cut it herself. She wore as much eyeliner as Roger did himself, making her eyes look bigger than they really were, and making her look dangerous all at once, if eye make-up could do that to a person. Mark really seemed to be interested, but Roger knew that wasn't the only reason that he paid no attention to the red head and was staring at the girl in pink._

_The song ended, Roger ending on the completely wrong note, and he signaled to the rest of the band that he was going to get a drink, and then he'd be back for another set. He stepped of the stage and crossed to the club, his hands actually shaking. The girl in pink was unapproachable, a bright wisp of color in the manly dark club dominated by Bohemians. She looked out of place and exactly right at the same time._

_Roger slid onto the chair next to her with an earnest, "Hi."_

_"Hello." She answered, not even looking at him._

_He extended his hand, "I'm Roger."_

_She glanced at him for a mere second, not shaking his hand. "I have a boyfriend."_

_Roger was taken aback. Apparently this girl didn't want to talk. He thought about just taking his beer and going back to the band, not saying another word to her. But, Roger knew if he did, he'd think about her for the rest of the night, and his guitar playing would severely suffer. Roger decided that he had to talk to her, no matter what she said._

_In other words, Roger Davis decided to get cocky._

_"Do you?" He said, and she did a double take, as if to say, 'What did you just say to me?' _

_Then, she raised an eyebrow. "I'm sorry? Were you talking to me?"_

_"Well, do you?" Roger retorted, raising an eyebrow himself, "I mean, do really have a boyfriend, or are you just saying that so I'll leave you alone with your Cosmo?"_

_She turned toward him, drumming her perfectly manicured, and surprisingly blue fingernails on the glossy black bar. "Okay, fine, you've caught me. But, sorry, I don't deal with," She made quotation marks in the air, ""Artists"" wearing too much black eyeliner and hair bleach for their own good."_

_"Well, aren't you lovely." _

_"I'm just telling you the truth."_

_Roger loved a challenge, and with each lightning-quick comeback, this girl just became more and more attractive in Roger's olive green eyes. "I bet your a lesbian."_

_Her eyes grew wide. "What?"_

_"Am I right? Is that why you're so disinterested?" He asked. "You're either a lesbian or a lawyer. No big deal, really. I know plenty of lesbians, and they don't bother me at all, but lawyers, oh, don't even get me started. If you're a lawyer, then it shouldn't be you shunning me, it should be me walking away from you." Roger nodded a thanks to the bartender as he handed him his drink, and he slowly began to walk away. 1...2...3..._

_"Wait!" the girl said, the first hint of emotion surfacing in her voice. She quickly got it under control, burying it deep in her icy facade. "For your information," her voice was cold once more. "I'm straight, and I'm an actress. Ever heard of a place called Broadway?"_

_Roger turned back around with a sly smile. She just couldn't be nice to him, could she? Who was he kidding, she had him completely enamored. "An actress, huh? I don't believe it." Anger flashed in her eyes. "You don't look like an actress."_

_"I don't?"_

_"No."_

_"Fine then." She said as she began pulling off her hot pink overcoat gracefully, revealing a blue halter top that matched her nails perfectly. That explained it._

_"Hmm, much better." Roger said, sitting back down next to her. "Who do you play?"_

_"I'm Val in "A Chorus Line"." She said, once again taking on that I-Don't-Care attitude._

_"You seem better suited to play an Ice Queen." Roger stated simply, not letting her know that he had no idea who Val was, or what A Chorus Line was. She opened her mouth to retaliate, but Roger stopped her. "You just don't let anyone in, do you?"_

_"Not you, at least."_

_Mark brushed against Roger as he left behind the red head. "Hey Rog, I'm leaving, 'Kay? Her name's April, isn't she hot?"_

_Roger raised his eyebrows and sighed, watching his roommate leave._

_"Who was that?" The girl asked._

_"First tell me your name."_

_"No."_

_"Fine then, I'm not telling you who that was."_

_A silence fell for a few seconds. She finished her Cosmo and ordered another one._

_"Alexia."_

_"Huh?"_

_"Alexia. That's my name. Alexia, Alexia Hemmingway."_

_"I'm Roger, Roger Davis, and that was my roommate, Mark Cohen, leaving, for what may be for the very first time, a club with a woman that he didn't come in with."_

_The girl, Alexia, actually laughed a little, and Roger's band mate motioned him back to the stage. "Nice talking to you, Alexia."_

_She just nodded but didn't say anything._

_As Roger took the stage again, an idea struck him full in the face. He stepped to the microphone. "This one's for Alexia the actress sitting at the bar with just her Cosmo for company,_

"_What is it about her that makes me want her?_

_What is it about her that turns me pale?"_

_Later that night, Roger left not only with his guitar, but with a cocktail napkin with Alexia's phone number written on it in fluorescent pink ink._

_A few days later, Roger had picked up the phone three times, dialed half of Alexia's number and hung up. He was too nervous to dial a phone number, let alone carry on a coherent conversation._

_He was about to try again, but just as he laid his hand on the phone and noticed that his black nail polish had miraculously stayed on for more than a day, the phone rang._

_"Screen that!" Mark called from the bathroom. He and April were in there, and Roger just knew that she was introducing him to heroine. He'd found her stash a few days ago. Roger shuddered, but still, it was Mark's life to go ahead and ruin, what kind of a say did Roger have? None._

_"SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"_

_There was silence on the end of then line for a few seconds. Roger took his hand off the phone._

_"Roger, hi, this is Alexia, Alexia Hemmingway," her voice suddenly sounded through the apartment, "Um, we met a CGBG's a few days ago-"_

_"H-hello?" Roger said, picking up the receiver._

_"Oh, hi. I didn't think you were home." Alexia said, laughing a little. "Hey, would you like to meet for coffee somewhere?"_

_Roger's green eyes grew wide. The Ice Queen had just asked him to get coffee with her. "Uh, sure, what time?"_

_Four weeks later, they were officially "a thing", or at least that's what Alexia said when Roger asked if they were an item yet. He'd even started referring to her as his girlfriend._

_Mark had become absent from the Loft more and more often. He'd leave with April early in the morning and come back late at night (if he came back at all), fresh track marks lining his pale arms. _

_Roger just pretended not to notice._

_He was too busy with his new girlfriend to even care much, anyway. He'd known people that did drugs before. Collins even smoked weed every no and then, no biggie, really. Sooner or Later Mark would get bored and he and April would move on to something else. Maybe booze. Who cared?_

_Not Roger. It wasn't any of his business._

_Roger and Alexia now sat across form each other at some ritzy restaurant uptown that she's brought him to. He'd taken off his nail polish and put on a pair of jeans that didn't have holes in the knees. Alexia looked gorgeous, wearing bright, sunny yellow. _

_They just sat and talked, like they usually did._

_It was actually quite nice._

_Four months after that, Roger and Alexia had the Loft all to themselves. Well, they did until Mark and April came bursting in through the steel door. Roger immediately knew that they were both high. April had changed Mark. He no longer wore his glasses, he had contacts. He no longer wore smart, preppy sweaters and scarves, he wore black leather and chains._

_"Who was that?" Alexia asked, confused._

_Roger hardly recognized his roommate, how could he expect Alexia to? _

_"Well, that's just my junkie roommate."_

_Alexia nodded, remembering the blonde from the night that she met Roger. He'd changed._

_A lot._

_Alexia just shook her head._

_"I'd ask you to move in, but those two..." Roger trailed off. Alexia shushed him by putting a finger to his lips._

_"Leave then. Move in with me Uptown."_

_It sounded Perfectly Marvelous._

_Eight months later, they were married._

_And five years after that, they were getting divorced. _

_It was a "No Fault" divorce. There were no kids to worry about, and the passion was just gone, so why stay together._

_Roger looked at himself in the mirror of the men's room of the courthouse. Well, he was officially, legally single again. He finished washing his hands, straightened his tie and walked back out._

_"Roger!" He heard Alexia call. She took his hand in both of hers. "Is there any way we can still be friends?"_

_Roger looked at his feet and then back up at his wife, no, ex-wife, and paused for a second before speaking. "Of course Lexia."_

_She kissed him lightly and Roger left._

_Walking out of the courthouse a single woman again, Alexia thought she saw someone that she almost recognized out of the corner of her eye. A very handsome blonde guy in thick black glasses was talking to her husband, no ex-husband._

_A ghost from long ago. From the night she met Roger. A throw-back to six years ago, to the night when her heart was melted by the man she'd just divorced. Roger shook the blonde's hand, but then pulled him into a hug, and was off._

_Alexia walked down a few more steps. "Mark?" She called, "Mark Cohen?"_

_The blonde turned around. She was right, and Alexia had to blink a few times. Last time she'd seen Mark, he'd been wearing a lot of black, had long hair, and fresh track marks on his arm. She'd assumed he'd be dead by now. But now, he looked like he had that first night at CGBG's, his hair short again, glasses back, and he looked healthy, he must be clean. He was wearing a red sweater with a blue strip across the front, and a brown corduroy jacket over his sweater, a dark blue and gray scarf under the collar. He carried an army green messenger bag that from the looks of it was a make-shift camera bag._

_"Alexia, hi." He said quietly, reserved. "So how does it feel to be single again?"_

_Alexia laughed sadly. "Not nearly as good as I thought it would. It feels crappy to know that I'm a divorced woman now."_

_"Well, it was nice to see you again." He said._

_"You look great." Alexia said, not realizing what she was saying before it was out of her mouth._

_Mark smiled. "Yeah, I've been clean for four years."_

_Alexia smiled herself. "That's good to hear."_

_"Yeah, I kind of realized what I'd gotten myself into when I O.D.ed one night and woke up in the hospital to the news that April'd killed herself. She thought I was dead and pulled a Juliet. I guess it's a blessing I got out before I caught something, y'know?"_

_Alexia looked at her feet. "Yeah, um, I'm sorry to hear that she died."_

_Guilt crossed Mark's electric blue eyes. "What am I doing telling you all of my problems, I'm sorry. You're the one that just got divorced, I've taken up too much of your time." He nodded a goodbye and turned to leave._

_But Alexia grabbed his hand, once again not realizing what she was doing before she was already in motion. It just seemed so fated, so right, like they were supposed to be together, but somehow that fate went askew. "Wait, no." She paused, once again saying the words that had started so much so long ago. "Let's go get some coffee."..._

...The sound of the closing door snapped Roger out of his what-if. He smiled.

Mark and Alexia were meant to be together, even in Roger's daydreams.

"Hey Hun." Mimi said, throwing her arms around Roger's neck. "So have you been writing?"

Roger thought for a second. "Yeah, kind of. Listen to this." He picked up his guitar and began to wing it.

"The two of us walked into that club,

Why we picked that one over any other pub,

I may never know.

I may never know why I met her,

I may never be sure

Why it was me instead of you that went for the ride of my life

All of the joy and the strife,

In a relationship that never seemed quite right.

I could have talked to the girl in pink that night,

She would have gone with me instead of you,

But instead I cornered the girl with red hair,

But still, you could have snagged her,

Left me there.

She and I would have talked for a while,

Over a Cosmo and Beer.

She would tell me that she didn't care

And never would.

And I get her phone number if I could.

And she'd hand to me on a cocktail napkin,

Written in pink ink."

He put his guitar down. "Well, that's all I've got."

Mimi clapped. "That was excellent!" She stood up, pulling Roger to his feet as well, his back toward the door, and kissed him.

Arthur Hemmingway snapped his Motorola cell phone shut. Stefanie had just told him all about Alexia's boyfriend, blonde, about so-tall.

She'd been calling and when he asked to speak to said sister's boyfriend, she said he wasn't there.

So, Arthur assumed that he'd be at the apartment that he and Arthur's sister shared. Arthur was glad he would have a chance to talk to the guy without his sister around as he climbed the stairs to the top floor and flung open the unlocked steel door.

Stefanie reemerged from the bathroom and sat down. "That was Arthur. He wanted to talk to you Mark, I told him you weren't exactly there. It's not like you would be in the ladies room!"

What Arthur Hemmingway saw when he walked into the Loft was a blonde guy about so tall kissing a Latin girl that was most defiantly **not** his sister.


	9. Chapter Eight: Who Are You?

Disclaimer: Nope, Still don't own it.

Authoress Note: Holy Cow! My first update to this story in five months! I am SO sorry for the delay! Also, there's been a change of pen name _pour moi_. Same me, different name. Also, I know this is too short for its own good.

So, here it is, Enjoy!

A Season of Love,

-The authoress formerly known as VivaLaVieBohemeA, now known as Galinda05

ALEXIA'S POV

I put my head in my hands. "Stef, you are such a doofus!" How could she be so aggravating and not even realize it? "Now Arthur's going to think that Mark's not here at the restaurant, period! He'll think he stood me up or something!"

"Baby, it's not that big of a-" Mark began, but I just interrupted him.

"Yes it is a big deal! My brother can be a psychopath! He might hate you for like, eternity!"

Arthur Hemming was fairly certain that the colour of his face rivaled that of a tomato. Or a fire truck.

Who was the schmuck that was…

It had to be Mark.

He seized the leather collar and pulled the blond up to his own height. The blond's tennis shoes just barely stayed on the ground. "So, you're cheating on my sister, are you?"

"What? Who the hell are you?" Roger shouted, fighting away from the muscular figure that had him by the coat collars.

Mimi flung a high heel that she'd managed to wrestle off in a matter of seconds. "Let go of him you walrus!"

Arthur dodged the projectile and kept his attention on Roger. "Who are **you**?"

"I'm Roger! Roger Davis!"

Arthur stopped dead in his tracks. "You're not Mark Cohen?"

"No, he's my roommate!"

_Whoops._


	10. Interlude One: Dirty Little Secret

Disclaimer: I own neither RENT nor the song "Dirty Little Secret". RENT is Jonathon Larson's "Dirty Little Secret" belongs to The All-American Rejects.

Authoress Note: This is an interlude chapter. Everyone has their Dirty Little Secret, including the Bohemians.

Chapter Nine: Dirty Little Secret

"_Let me know that I've done wrong_

_When I've known this all along_

_I go around a time or two_

_Just to waste my time with you_

_Tell me all that you've thrown away_

_Find out games you don't wanna play_

_You are the only one that needs to know_

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_(Dirty little secret)_

_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret_

_(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)_

_My dirty little secret_

_Who has to know?_

_When we live such fragile lives_

_It's the best way we survive_

_I go around a time or two_

_Just to waste my time with you_

_Tell me all that you've thrown away_

_Find out games you don't wanna play_

_You are the only one that needs to know_

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_(Dirty little secret)_

_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret_

_(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)_

_My dirty little secret_

_Who has to know?_

_The way she feels inside (inside)_

_Those thoughts I can't deny (deny)_

_These sleeping dogs won't lie (won't lie)_

_And now I try to lie_

_It's eating me apart_

_Trace this life out_

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_(Dirty little secret)_

_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret_

_(Just another regret)_

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_(Dirty little secret)_

_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret_

_(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)_

_My dirty little secret_

_Dirty little secret_

_Dirty little secret_

_Who has to know?_

_Who has to know?"_

_**Roger**_

I didn't write "Your Eyes" for Mimi.

I wrote it for April.

I'm still searching for that one song.

"_These sleeping dogs won't lie (won't lie)_

_And now I try to lie."_

_**Collins**_

Everyone calls me Tom Collins because that was my drink of choice the night that I ran naked through the Parthenon.

What's my real name?

I'll never tell.

"_Who has to know?"_

_**Angel**_

When I was six, my mother caught me wearing her red stilettos.

The next day, she gave me my very first lip gloss and told me I was an original.

It was the last time someone called me special until I met Tom.

"_Just another regret, hope that you can keep it."_

_**Maureen**_

Sometimes I'm with Joanne and I wonder if Mark really was the love of my life.

"_It's eating me apart_

_Trace this life out."_

_**Joanne**_

When I'm tangoing with Mark is the only time that I feel truly alive.

"_Tell me all that you've thrown away_

_Find out games you don't wanna play_

_You are the only one that needs to know."_

_**Alexia**_

I'm a Wiccan, yet I wear a silver and blue cross on a chain around my neck.

Sometimes I wonder if any God is even really there.

_"Let me know that I've done wrong_

_When I've known this all along."_

_**Mimi**_

I knew I loved Roger even before I knew who he was.

I always pretended that Benny was the sexy rocker from upstairs.

"_When we live such fragile lives_

_It's the best way we survive._

_I go around a time or two_

_Just to waste my time with you."_

_**Benny**_

I have the hots for Alexia. She's curt, crass and utterly beautiful.

"_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret."_

_**Mark**_

I'm going to ask her to marry me.

I already bought the ring.

I'm just not sure that she'll say yes.

"_I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_(Dirty little secret)_

_Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret_

_(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)_

_My dirty little secret_

_Dirty little secret_

_Dirty little secret_

_Who has to know?_

_Who has to know?"_


End file.
